Author Archives: kyroot222

Tar Baby in the Briar Patch

Note: No one’s liver, lungs, or kidneys ever say such things.  No sir, there is only one tar baby in every man’s briar patch, and you brung ‘er there yourself!    Yes sir, ‘course that’s not technically correct.  You was forced to bring ‘er!  Still … Continue reading

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The Big Boy Version

You do realize that the blunt, Big Boy Version is that anyone who reads a book, listens to the radio, or goes to a movie is blatantly admitting their mental inadequacy? To the son, the father said, “The reason that … Continue reading

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No One Can

Definition:  A mystical martyr is a stupid, vain, (ah, redundancy), man whose masquerade mask slips from his hand.  The town of Clarity, so passionately cried for by party goers still in costume, is to be found on your internal map just between, What-The-Hell-Does-That-Mean and … Continue reading

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Get-Ahead, Stay-Ahead

Thinking that there is something you can learn that will make you see-what-is-going-on, is like wanting to dress up your hair, and after giving it a perfunctory try, from then on, mistaking the comb you left there for your hair. Only burned books are useful, and … Continue reading

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Wise Up!

A feature of an enlightened man might be that he has no real interest in other people’s lives…and in truth is pretty indifferent even toward his own. One day it suddenly hit a man that everything that bothered him was, in some … Continue reading

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Metaphorical and Literal

How can people believe it when they say, “I know that I do not understand such and such matter correctly.”  What else does a human possess by which to understand things other than the thing doing so now?  When you realize … Continue reading

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The Rules of the Game

Fact: Un-winnable wars are waged only by the foolishly serious. Fact: All conflicts not over Krispy Kremes, or Kourtesans are foolish, un-winnable, un-losable, and one heck of a way to pass seventy otherwise boring human years.  Footnote de obscuria: There is an … Continue reading

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Running with Scissors

As they sat resting between bouts of running with scissors, and shooting B.B. guns at each other’s eyes, a boy noted to his pal, “The neat thing about playing games that you can’t win is that you never lack for … Continue reading

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Crime Stopper’s Tips

The problem with trying to redeem yourself is in not being able to feel when the job’s complete. Crime Stopper’s Tip:The motive for everything is the same. Being “conscious” in the common sense of the term is this:Sharing everyone else’s confusion.Why … Continue reading

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Reports from Near and Far

Reports from Near and Far (And Don’t Forget Pomona).   The father said to his son:“Folklore throughout the world has always held that making constant noise will keep away evil spirits.”  And the lad complained: “But we were talkingabout consciousness.”  And the … Continue reading

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