Jan introduced his “Code” at the end of 1987, but continued developing this meme of being a “revolutionary” for several years. Here are two examples of him speaking of the list itself. (The second part of this section presents Jan’s comments on many of the listed suggestions.)
“The following simple maxims are not part of some moralistic philosophy. They are part and parcel of what I have been recently talking about: ‘If you don’t act right, you don’t feel right.’ They have to do with making your time and efforts profitable here.” Talk # 0276
From Talk # 0307– “In the City (of ordinary mental activity) the expected conduct of its people is well established, while those who aspire to Revolutionist status are left without a parallel structure. Thus, for just a moment of caprice and whimsey, let us imagine there is a “Revolutionist’s Code of Conduct,” an Insurgent’s Guide to External Etiquette, and in the spirit of this harmless amusement, I would suggest that such an imaginary code might include the following:”
Don’t steal or be deceitful.
Stay out of debt.
If you have to do harm to lesser life — to ants, flies, roaches, bushes, which we all do — you should say, “I’m sorry, kid.”
You should say the opposite of what you chemically feel toward things that annoy you.
You should say to yourself, “I sure do hope I pass the test,” whenever you feel superior to anybody, or whenever anybody makes you mad.
You should have no interest in other people’s personal lives.
You should have no electrified (mentally “entertained”) opinions about some very specific things, in particular: anyone’s race, nationality, religion, sex or sexual habits, or their cultural background.
You should treat the electrified desire for revenge as a totally uncollectible fungus-debt.
Don’t talk about health, wealth, or age.
Don’t pretend to be special.
Be alert, even skeptical, but never cynical.
Do not curse, unless you really mean it.
Be brief and elusive, if not invisible.
Always remember time.
Do not repay friendship, attraction, or lust with criticism.
Always smile just before you speak.
Don’t bother at all with those who use the word, (capital-“G”) god.
Pursue your hobbies diligently.
Eat, run, smile, and sleep as needed.
Keep your hands off your parents, but call your mother.
Look up whenever possible.
Don’t do interviews.
Ask all birds, “Are you from around here?”
Always act and think about acting.
Never talk about things already done.
Never talk about what you may do.
Drop all habits non-publicly.
Admit to nothing.
Think not of any genetic shortfalls that you may have.
Live as though you’re going to die yesterday.
Say the word “love” only to those who really know what you mean.
Be dull only on the surface (where it counts).
Don’t keep useless or ugly stuff.
Be poor only by choice.
Always remember how funny you really are.
Don’t give sex a second thought.
If you’re lonely — stop it.
Establish a secret hermitage.
Stay free from all debts.
Enjoy what you really enjoy with no restraint, no guilt.
Don’t let the blues get into your Blue Circuit.
Always remember the joy and energy of good Yellow Circuit food.
Don’t waste anything.
Debate with no one.
If you’re uncontrollably serious, you’re sidetracked.
Don’t think about stuff that only has two sides.
Don’t be angry at a clock if you oversleep.
If you let feeling sorry for yourself become electrified, you cease having a self.
Look after yourself, but don’t conceive of your fortune as being only at the expense of others.
Stare not.
Debt not.
Hangeth not around with dumb or cruel-ish people.
At least once a day, be amazed at you and This coming together.
Hurt not thy back whenever possible.
Be secretly better than your religion.
Rejoice only slightly at the reported injuries of hunters and fishermen.
Do more than merely think about things that truly interest you.
Ask not for mercy except if you’re doing it willfully or if it’s an absolute, last-ditch stand.
Stand up straight.
Whenever possible, drop a few pounds.
Treat everyone as your superior, but in an indifferent fashion.
Keep your personal life lean and neat.
Always remember that everybody does what Life tells them will be pleasurable and necessary.
If you do not let the chemical become electrical, then you don’t think about it.
If you’re ever asked what you believe, smile and say, “Everything.”
Pay all debts, and returneth there not.
Seek privileged information, while likewise seeking to give out none about yourself.
Always attempt to be thinking (electrifying) more than two things at once.
Don’t do stuff you don’t want to do.
Don’t be cynical regarding how other people have fun, but always know where the back door is.
Share when you want to, and when you can, and when you don’t.
Confuse not acting with thinking of acting.
Treat everyone’s autobiography as fiction.
Get fresh air and solar food. Don’t do “that” if “that” hurts.
Don’t be self-conscious unless you’ve got a self.
Don’t tell anyone seriously that you’ll do something, unless you will, or unless you fully didn’t mean it.
Don’t let yourself feel distant or estranged from This without noting that the feeling is one-sided and it’s always “I” based.
Don’t appear too scruffy or weird.
Never let them see you look mad or disappointed.
Don’t still expect something for nothing, even Here.
Hug somebody when you want to, and don’t give it a second thought. Don’t even give it a first thought.
Worry not about anything you’ve already done, or anything you might do.
Act alert, and appear interested.
Don’t sweat unless you’re smiling.
Be the first to say “Hello,” and “Good-bye.”
Suspend talk about money.
Appear to be involved in some deliberate activity, or else totally at ease.
Refrain from putting your name on possessions.
Always wear your armor, and under it, your camouflage garb.
Act as though you don’t know the word envy.
Accept no credit, and arrest any desire to seek it.
Avoid publicity.
You can appear ordinary, but not common.
There is no need to be uncomfortable.
Shed the appearance of being a consumer of any sort.
Forsake comment on the failures of any Institutions.
Keep no photographs of yourself.
If you must deal with relatives treat them like foreign dignitaries.
Steer clear of solemn talk with solemn people.
Adopt a Personal Code of Quietness.
Decline to comment on, or compliment people’s possessions.
Eschew verbal, fad words and phrases. Drive slow.
Act completely confident under all circumstances; never let them see you confused, or hesitant.
Forbear to correct people.
If you suspect you might have to subsequently apologize for some particular behavior, don’t behave.
If possible, do not wear a watch.
Never appear hungry.
Speak moderately, and never raise your voice, or shout.
Appear reasonably kind.
Refuse to show your wounds, or point out your deformities.
Withhold any acknowledgement of enemies.
Dress with the latest fads only if you can pull it off correctly.
Check any mention of your health.
Although there is little really worth buying, there’s no need to appear cheap.
Try to interfere with people becoming impressed by you; at the very least, keep them from saying so.
Reveal no information regarding your family, religion, education, or place of birth.
Don’t discuss yesterday.
Be simple and direct.
Squelch any desire to mention habits-abandoned, or sights-seen.
Pick up after yourself, leave no visible trail.
Try to avoid buying new stuff.
Refer to your present abode as your house, never your home.
Let no one hear you whine, or complain.
Be judicious with any use of euphemisms, and do not speak in metaphors when you intend the literal.
Never be cynical, sarcastic, or rude to anyone.
Keep your distance from any group, organization, or institution.
Move smoothly, or don’t move at all.
Remember, secrecy is good taste; that’s all you need to know.
Smile at everything.
Act as though the world is big enough for everybody.
Speak less than those with whom you’re speaking.
Anything you must be talked into, you shouldn’t be.
Keep quiet about age.
Give no appearance of regret.
Stay lean, and this, far beyond the physical.
Be exact: say “I will not,” not, “I cannot.”
Remember, to others, appearances are damn near everything.
Be prepared for death; not merely the physical, but the annihilation of your status preference.
All things, great and small come to an end; act as though you think of this constantly.
Befriend no one who has not respect. Walk in no one’s shadow.
Withhold your praise from the weak and unjust.
In worldly matters, always say what you’re going to say before you have to actually say it.
Every moment, and every movement should be in service to the Revolution. Ask your adversaries to continually restate their position.
You may appear to go along, but you cannot fit.
If you must apologize for someone, do it only once.
Cultivate courage, not strategy; actual combat requires execution, not artful maneuvers.Even if you’re lame, don’t limp where it counts.
Strive daily for a better understanding of the Revolution, and your duty; do not believe that you have achieved it today.
Remain open twenty-four hours a day, and adopt an equal access policy for all new ideas, and customers.
See clearly the distinction between interest and expected success.
Conduct yourself as though you were the first to discover that no one’s perfect.
Set your behavior, and other Revolutionary matters, free from the calculations of potential profit-&-loss.
Show no interest in “fake,” that is, City notions of elegance.
While still being civil and courteous, remember that it is City dwellers who are bothered with “status” and the “impression they make”; the Revolutionist cannot be concerned with what others may think of him – an act suitable only for lesser dogs in a pack.
Cultivate the fear of but one thing, the disgrace in failure-of-duty (to your Aim)..
Save your love for the living, and your respect for the duty bound.
Thou shalt not whine.
Don’t speak of things as being “unlikely,” or “improbable,” just say, “It’s possible.”
Jan’s Commentary on the Code
Now I’ll comment on what I have just read: Don’t steal. Don’t be deceitful –– especially to friends, and double-especially to anyone involved in This. You surely realize that all religions and moral systems state some version of “Thou shalt not steal.” I’m telling you there is a molecular, chemical basis for this. Stealing is one of the worst — one of the least profitable — things you can do. Let me spell it out for you: if you have to look around to make sure nobody saw you do something, you are stealing. Not paying a debt, for example, is a form of stealing. I don’t care what the circumstances are, if you try to avoid repayment of a debt, you are poisoning yourself. Whether it’s a dollar or ten thousand dollars, if you avoid paying a debt you are stealing, and that is the worst possible bargain you could strike.
All that matters is that you personally feel (even the tiniest bit) that you are stealing. Let me put it in cruder terms. If you have to get an unlisted number, if you have to send letters back with “moved” and “deceased” written all over them, if you have to watch where you go because somebody might recognize you — you are engaging in theft and deceit. Forget the words. As always, they are simply smoke signals. They are a way for me to transmit my understanding of Life to you (through the medium of sound waves in this case) in order to possibly effect, in you, an unusual molecular change. The reality is not in the words “theft” or “deceit.” Every religion in the world condemns the words, but what I intend goes far beyond that. There’s a reality behind the words, and I’m telling you: Don’t steal.
This Activity has nothing to do with “commandments.” Nevertheless, every one of the things I read from my list, even the ones that elicit a titter from the listeners, every single one is deadly serious. I’ll go further than that. If you were free of the confines of the chemically based, 3-D consciousness common to all of humanity, the reality behind everything on my list would seem obvious and natural to you. You would be extraordinary, though nobody would recognize you as such. You would be extraordinary because Life wired you up in such a way that you have a personal opportunity to know that stealing is unprofitable. Not because it’s against your religion, or your culture, or because you have an ingrained, subconscious memory of your father saying that he would tan your hide if he ever caught you stealing anything. Simply put, you don’t do it because it is poison for someone attempting This.
If you can feel the reality of this particular one-liner of mine, then you feel it in your very molecules. You then simply follow your own internal sense and refrain from stealing in the same manner that you refrain from brushing your teeth with paint thinner. No discussion is necessary. There is no need to seek out advice, nor is there any need to debate the issue. No amount of money is worth the cost of theft.
*
Now the second one — you may have noticed my humor of mentioning it four or five times — about not being in debt at all. I’m going to tell you something else, and this is not a social, psychological or fiscal comment: anyone seriously committed to This should simply not be in debt. If you are in debt, you should get the hell out and stay out. I mean stay out. I mean this most seriously. It is not worth it to be in debt. This has nothing to do with being against possessions or your enjoyment of them. Again, there is a molecular, chemical basis for this injunction.
Many ordinary people feel a piece of what I am saying, but they have no notion of the reality behind the words. You simply should not be in debt — not because it is bad for you psychologically — it is bad for you physically, from the molecular level up. Do whatever you have to do to get out of debt, and keep yourself out. You will be much better off. Debt is another form of poison for people involved with This. You should not be in debt for any amount, not even a dollar, and in particular, you should not have gotten there by theft or deceit.
*
On to the next one. You should say — whether out loud or to yourself: “Geez, kid, I’m sorry,” whenever you have to cause harm to some living thing. All of you should feel something regarding this, although the perception will vary from person to person. Some of you will think following this item is sort of silly, and others will tend to overdo it. You can only do the possible. From one viewpoint, you wreak destruction every time you take a step or draw a breath. It’s simply a fact of life that you cause death to something as you live. Of course, something’s going to crush and eat you eventually. But if you have to kill fleas to keep your dog healthy, or brush insects from your food, or break branches from trees — you should feel absolutely no sense of joy or sport about it, and you should literally say, “Geez, kid, I’m sorry. You know it’s nothing personal. I am sorry.” Your personal intention should be that, if things were different, you would spare that life if possible. You should not take away any part of life without awareness that at this level, you are killing something.
*
Next, you should say the opposite of what you chemically feel. For example, perhaps you are walking down the street and you see a beer can thrown on the ground, and inside you the people immediately rise up, muttering about the crude curs and dolts that ride through life throwing beer cans around. If that’s what you are wired up chemically to feel about the situation, then you should say just the opposite. Say, “Oh boy, isn’t it great that somebody had fun and drank a beer? Wow, they must have really had fun to sling those cans around like that!” Or say, “Hey, isn’t it great that they were smart enough to throw it out the window instead of messing up their car, or taking it home and messing up their house?” It doesn’t matter if what you say seems ridiculous, as long as it’s something more or less “opposite” to what you are chemically feeling at the moment. Someone drives by and shouts an insult at you. Say to yourself, “Boy, isn’t it good that person isn’t deaf and dumb? Don’t they have a nice voice? Isn’t it good they could holler at me instead of going home all tensed up and maybe beating their wife or child?” Use your imagination. Besides, the funnier it is, the harder it is for you to get caught up with feeling serious about your feelings.
*
You should be thinking, “I hope I pass the test,” whenever anyone apparently causes you to be angry. You may recall my earlier comments on this: if you’re in a position where you suddenly feel either superior or angry, you should immediately consider that Life is testing you to see whether you’re still the same old Charlie that can be thrown to the ground by the same old kinds of influences — whatever they may be for you personally. You should consider, when something negative in you rises up from the chemical level to the electrical level — you should treat the situation at that instant as though you are the slowest-witted person on the planet. Act as though there are secret forces of Life out there who arrange things periodically to trip people up — just to see how they are coming along. You should consider yourself to be so far down the evolutionary ladder right now that Life tests you more than once. Maybe once a week.
Act as though Life’s tricksters just can’t believe anyone could be so dumb that they can be tripped up over and over again. So maybe (in metaphorical terms) just for fun, one of them takes on the appearance of a guy in a pickup truck and hollers, “Hey, fatso!” to see if you still get crazy and go into a screaming fit. Then that secret agent can look at you with your face all screwed up and your fists clenched and say, “Good grief. There he goes again. Somebody’s got to be low man on the totem pole, and this guy will never learn.” You should think this every time you catch yourself getting mad, feeling superior to anyone else, or feeling sorry for yourself. You should be thinking to yourself, “Gee, I hope I pass the test. I hope I keep this anger from becoming electrical before they catch on I was about to fall for that old trick again.”
*
You should have no interest in other people’s personal lives. This is related to something else I’ve mentioned — that you should have no heroes. You’re not capable of picturing a hero. I know you think you are, but you’re not. Anyone that ordinary consciousness can imagine as a hero is not a hero. What can be imagined is just a sort of 3-D invention of the gods all over again. Man takes his own inbred, genetic, molecular “weaknesses,” (the parts that are missing; the parts that by being missing make man what he is) and creates a hero out of those parts. All gossip, whether it’s between you and a friend, or just reading a popular magazine about film stars, is unprofitable action for those pursuing This. It’s not “wrong” because it’s culturally unseemly: rather, it’s molecularly poisonous to spend time and energy day-dreaming about someone else’s personal life.
Ask yourself this: “What have I ever gained, really, from such day-dreaming?” The answer is, nothing. Worse than nothing, because it’s a poisonous, continual, molecular reinforcement of the structures of nonexistent heroes. Such reinforcement allows you to continue in your feelings of impotence. You are wired up to imagine that someone else has more power than you, through luck, birth, position, or effort. Listen, there is nobody on the perceivable horizon, historically or coevally, worthy of this kind of attention from you, much less your adoration. Nobody. For ordinary people, gossip and hero worship are important stuff, holding the fabric of life together. For you, it is poison.
*
You should have no electrified opinions concerning race, nationality, culture, etc. I know these “prejudices” are built into humanity. They’re there for good reason. In ordinary life, there’s a real basis to feeling nationalistic — it’s not just rednecks standing on the corner down in Alabama, or people who cry when the American flag goes by, or people who holler, “Hey, let’s run everybody out of the country that wasn’t born here!” There is a reality to all these opinions. They’re not culturally learned. Let me remind you again, there is no such thing as cultural; nor is it “environmentally learned.” There is a built-in, hereditary basis to the hostility one race feels toward another.
There is even a inborn basis for the tension between the sexes, although rather than hostility, a better description would be the tension between dominant and submissive forces. Nevertheless, all racialistic, nationalistic and chauvinistic feelings have a molecular, built-in basis, and they serve a purpose out there in ordinary life. The French against the Germans, the Germans against the Jews, and the Jews against the Arabs — you know all the stories. Prejudice is necessary to help keep Life going. But for the Real Revolutionary, these feelings of superiority are another form of poison. I’m personally delighted to be living in this country, and I don’t know of any reason why I should move from it. But to let this feeling pass from the chemical to the electrical to somehow be proud of being white, black, Jewish, Christian, American, French, Spanish — that is poison. The Real Revolutionist has no allegiance — None. He cannot have any. Any allegiance to the limited perceptions of the ordinary world is a form of slavery — slavery to your genes.
*
Next: Treat the electrified desire (that is, actually thinking about it) for revenge as a kind of uncollectible debt. Treat the desire for revenge as a fungus that can never be eradicated. Act as if there is no form of Clorox or Lysol spray that will take away this fungus. There is, of course, a chemical reality to revenge, which is similar to my pointing out that there is a chemical basis for jealousy. But you cannot tolerate letting the urge for revenge moving up to the electrical level, where you actually have to start thinking about it — plotting and planning just what you’ll do to that bastard if only you can get your hands around his neck.
Jealousy and revenge are very similar, and, like a lot of other things, they’re necessary to keep the world turning. But they are not necessary for you. If you let your desire for revenge become electrified, you have not hurt your neighbor or your fellow man. What is important to you is that poison of a very particular sort has reached your upper circuitry when you could have stopped it. Revenge is a poisonous debt that cannot be paid off. “Getting revenge,” once your desire for it becomes electrified, is impossible.
Does that sound weird? It’s not so weird. If the desire was simply chemical, satisfaction would be easy. If you wanted revenge against someone, you’d simply kill them, and that would take care of it. Even if that were possible in today’s society, my saying contains a trick: you’d have to kill them and still not think about it. Of course, not getting caught would help, too.
Anyone who has the potential to be a Real Revolutionary should have a taste for the fact that you can’t even get what you think of as revenge and be satisfied with it. It’s never what you thought it would be, and it never makes you feel the way you imagined it would make you feel. Religions have even noted this after a fashion, by saying that when you try to get revenge, the gods take away the sweetness of it because it’s wrong. They are noting a reality.
Let me expand on my little joke about how you could get revenge (but only on the chemical level) if you killed the person. You might consider this: once you have electrified the desire for revenge, you can’t satisfy it. Revenge can never be satisfactory, because it is not electrically based — it is chemically based. So, like many, many other things the Yellow Circuit imagines, the imagining never turns out quite like the reality. Picture a situation where a man has a vitamin B deficiency. He eats everything he can get his hands on, but all he consumes are fats and sugars. The man may become full, but he won’t be feeding the real hunger. Once a desire/urge moves from its point of origin in a lower circuit into the Yellow Circuit where you can think about it, it cannot be truly satisfied. Hence, the Yellow Circuit is never really satisfied with anything you do. Revenge? “Nah, that ain’t it. We’ve crippled him and broke him, but that still ain’t it. What’s missing? Oh, sure, now we’ll take his wife.” So, they take his wife. “Nah, that still doesn’t do it. I know, we’ll ruin his children…Nope…damn! What is it?” Life does not commit suicide. Revenge is an uncollectible debt, and you are only poisoning yourself to try to collect it — even if only in the realm of “thoughts.”
*
Don’t ever talk about health, wealth, or age. Many of those who get involved with this activity remain healthy and here, whereas if they had been left to their own devices elsewhere, they would be numbered either among the dead or the living, walking dead. These same people understand some of my reasons behind this item on my list, because I literally told them: “Whatever your problem is, don’t ever talk about it again.” It has an effect. Approaching 40? Don’t talk about it. Yeah, I know, there is a molecular basis for the “middle age crazies” in both men and women, but if you want to remain ultimately healthy, don’t talk about it! Don’t worry over it; don’t electrify it. I gave you the immediate treatment, which is simply, “Forget it.” Don’t put words to it, and it will take care of itself. Other people may go through that sort of craziness for years, but once it hits you, you can get over it in a matter of weeks, maybe days. If age is the item and you hit 40, don’t think about it, don’t feel sorry for yourself, don’t conjure up pictures of all the things you think you’ve missed in life. It’s a real feeling, but it’s strictly a chemical feeling. Don’t drag it out, and poison yourself by making it electrical. That won’t help, and could hurt you a great deal.
Even talking in general about your health is a sort of poison. I don’t mean for you to be ridiculous about it. Don’t volunteer to carry refrigerators around if you’ve just hurt your back. All you’ve got to say, if someone should ask for refrigerator help is, “I hurt my back.” Or, if you’ve got the flu, and you’ve got to tell someone here in order to avoid injuring yourself, all you have to say is, “I can’t. I’ve got the flu.” Everyone here will understand, and there’ll be no more said or expected of you. Outside of Here, do whatever will cause you the least problem. But don’t discuss your health with anyone but your doctor, and then only if you really need to.
Don’t discuss your wealth either. That is, don’t discuss your position in the financial order of things. Don’t engage in conversations at the check out line on the basis of, “Yeah, I know. Prices have gone up all over and I can hardly make it.” Don’t discuss your finances with anybody, even your family.
When it comes to health, age, and wealth, just don’t play. I don’t care if you’re stooped over and look like you’re eighty, if somebody says, “God, it’s hell to be fifty, isn’t it?” just look off like you don’t know what fifty is. Or eighty either. I’m telling you, don’t play.
*
Next: Don’t pretend to be special. As far as I’m concerned, this one is self-explanatory.
*
Next: Be alert, even skeptical, but do not be cynical. Well, I’m still left with ordinary, binary words, which would have me again apparently trying to dis-assemble Man. Although words are all we’ve got, let me remind you that I’m not dealing with binary dismemberment. The approximate dictionary definition of “cynical” is tied to already established opinions. If you’re cynical, you don’t believe what somebody has said, what somebody has predicted will come to pass, or what somebody has promised you they will do. Or all 3. All cynicism is based on an already established feeling or belief. If you’re following me so far, you must see that this definition of “cynical” doesn’t convey what I mean by “alert or even skeptical.” If you can expand the idea of “alert” to the fourth dimension, you’ll begin to get the picture.
The skepticism I speak of does not involve cynicism. Skepticism involves the way you look, the way you listen, and the way you view a situation. Skepticism is perception with an extra dimensional alertness — not based on any already established belief or opinion you may have. Such alertness has nothing to do with feeling that you’re about to be taken in, or that you “can’t trust these people.” The skeptic I’m talking about would simply try to listen with three ears, without depending on anybody else’s word. He would withhold belief in a non-pessimistic and a non-negative manner.
When you are properly alert and skeptical, you know you can’t directly trust anyone’s autobiography to be anything other than fiction. Likewise, you realize that they can’t help that it’s nothing but fiction. At least, you understand that no one’s word is worth any more than your word at the ordinary level. And if you’re anywhere past ordinary, you know just how little your Line level word is worth. From a properly alert and skeptical vantage point, your observations are not based on cynicism, but on an F.F. (A frigging fact.)
*
You’ll notice I did a little self-censorship, because the next one on my list is “don’t curse.” Whatever I may mean by using cuss words, it still stands that you shouldn’t curse unless you really mean it. It’s another type of poison. Not because you’ll hurt your social standing, but because you are letting yourself molecularly be pushed around. It’s a form of hostility, of seeking revenge. “God damn clock!!!” It’s not the clock’s fault that you overslept again. Maybe you kick poor old dirt because you turned your ankle, or spit on the ground because you tripped. All of this is a form of cursing.
*
Next one: Be brief and elusive, if not invisible. Self-explanatory again.
*
Next, always remember time and the incomplete nature of the 3-D world.
*
Don’t repay friendship with criticism. I’ve mentioned this one before. In fact, I said that to do so would probably be about the s-h-i-t-t-i-e-s-t form of payment to give someone who had given you enjoyment. Somebody gave you affection, friendship, or worse yet, laid you once or many times, and then you pay them back by saying, “Hon, can I tell you something for your own good?” Or, “God, you are so enjoyable in bed, and instead of offering you a cigarette, let me offer you some advice…” I repeat: It’s the worst form of payment you can give.
*
Always smile just before you speak. I’m not going to say much about this one because I may come back to it later and expound on it. Take my word for it that this has a real, factual basis. You don’t always have to smile externally — sometimes smiling might not even be advisable. Given enough juice on your own, you would eventually discover this one for yourself. It doesn’t matter whether it shows by your mouth going up to your ears, it will show to you, and in the manner in which you speak. Always, always.
*
Don’t bother with anybody who talks seriously about a capital-“G” god. This one should be self-explanatory. After all I’ve said, you know this is not an attack on religion. I’m about to run out of any lingering sense that any of you feel this is important enough for me to point it out one more time. You should be past any molecular belief that any religion (past or present) has any consequence or meaning vis a vis what you’re trying to do Here. Suppose you’re listening to or reading someone that you regard with at least a little interest or respect; if the person uses a capital-“G” god in any other way than I do (that is, in passing, as a kind of historical reference) ignore him. You’re not going anywhere. I don’t mean you can’t get something out of what such people say, just don’t expect an “unveiling of the truth.” This is a dead-end street that runs into a nuclear dump. (I said that to make it sound worse than the other things I’ve been calling “poison.” This is super poison.)
*
Pursue your hobby diligently. I mention this periodically and it is serious. I don’t say it just to harass people, or to distract you from the serious nature of what you are attempting. If you personally have a real hobby, pursue it. You should stick with it diligently. If you ignore your hobby, or put off pursuing it, it can go away. If you ignore it you may gradually seem to lose interest. Not to give you the blues, but if it was real hobby, a real interest for you, you might live to regret that you did not pursue it.
*
Next: Eat, run, smile, and sleep as needed. You’d think this one would be self-evident, wouldn’t you? In addition to anything I may suggest, eat whatever you need to eat, whenever you need to. If you’ve got medicine you should take, take your medicine. That’s part of eating. Regarding exercise, choose some form of movement that you personally enjoy, and do it. I have to stop here and ask a “rhetorical” question. Have you ever noticed that nowhere in all the history of religion, wise men and “guru-dom” can be found a reference that says the great guys ever exercised, or asked anybody else to? Surely some of you have thought that at a bad moment, four miles into a run and aching all over…
*
Next, keep your hands off your parents, but call home. I know this doesn’t necessarily sound self-evident, but this one is so basic, and not doing it is so fraught with poison, that you should just take my absolute word for it. Keep your hands off your parents. Forget and strike out all debts “real” or “imaginary” that you think your parents owe you. Forget every mistake you think they ever made. Just forget it. Mark it all off as the ultimate bad debt, and refuse ever to think about it again. But if they have any interest in you, call home from time to time. Hug them over the phone, but don’t do interviews or reveal anything much about yourselves.
The parent/child game, with all its real or imagined debts, is common enough out in ordinary life, but it represents a poisonous attempt to reverse a flow of energy that has already been spent, and so is extremely inappropriate for you Here. No nourishment exists on the basis of what is still owed to whom. In fact, you literally must act as though there not only are no debts, there never were any debts. If your parents bring up anything, or try to apologize for something in the past, you’ve got to feel and act as though you don’t know what on earth they’re talking about. Not only don’t listen, don’t hear it.
*
You should hug and kiss all dogs if you can. Everybody understands that except those of you who don’t, or can’t. I won’t say it’s alright if you can’t. I’ll just note: That’s the way it is. For the rest — go right on ahead.
*
Next, don’t get in debt. Yeah, I know I said it before. It’s a good one.
*
Look up whenever possible. You should know that by now. Of course, you’re excused if it’s raining really hard.
*
Don’t do interviews. I think we’ve been through this one enough.
*
Ask all birds, “Are you from around here?” I heard some titters on this one. Believe me, you ought to speak to birds. Whenever you walk or run outside, you’ll always see them up there flying around and landing on power lines, or sitting on the other side of the road, and taking off when you come too close. People don’t notice birds outside much, but believe me, you should. Don’t try to hug them, of course, just speak to them. And the best thing I’ve found to say to them is either, “Are you from around here?,” or, “Do you live here?” I don’t know — it just seems like the thing. It works for me. Even if they’re already flying off.
*
Always act and think of acting. Another obvious one.
*
Do not electrify — that is, do not think about — any genetic shortcoming you may have. If you were born with a bad leg, or one eye, what do you want? You know it; everybody else knows it. Forget it. What is there to talk or think about? Unless you can grow a new eyeball, or whatever, why waste the energy?
*
Live each day as though you were going to die yesterday. Enough said.
*
About the word “love.” If you really want to use the actual word “love,” say it only to someone you are really sure knows what you mean. Even though it’s just a word, a sound, don’t say it at all unless you are positive the person you are saying it to understands what you are trying to say.
*
Next, don’t keep useless or ugly stuff. Notice, I didn’t say don’t get useless or ugly stuff — there’s nothing to be gained by demanding the impossible. But don’t keep it, at least, once you realize it’s ugly or useless. Are we talking about possessions or something else? (Don’t bug me, son, I’m trying to read through all this. Figure it out for yourself.)
*
Be poor only by choice. I know I’ve said things in the past that would make you suspect you can’t work efficiently here and still worry about being rich and famous, etc. There’s nothing wrong with being rich and/or famous per se, but the effort that it takes to get there is another matter entirely. On the other hand, there’s nothing wrong with being poor either, as long as it’s a decision that you, yourself, made. I mean that in the sense that you may want to work fewer hours than the normal 40, making only enough to feed yourself and stay even with Life. (And feed your hobbies, of course.) If you choose it, that’s fine — whatever level of finances it is — but don’t allow yourself to live in such a way that you blame circumstance for making you poorer than you want to be. If you’re happy playing out in traffic less than other people, if you’re satisfied with it, go right ahead. No problem. Just don’t try to blame Life for your personal financial situation. That’s a serious sidetrack that will ruin you Here.
*
Next: Always remember how funny you really are. Maybe we shouldn’t stop and try to rub our collective faces in this one.
*
Don’t give sex a second thought. What I mean is this: with you, sex should properly fall into the realm of action, not thought. Not thinking of action. Therefore, I’m just using a standard way of saying things; actually, you should not give sex a first thought. If you never gave it a thought, for example, you could never say, or think, that you have a sexual problem, could you? Suffering over sex would be impossible. You would never do anything sexually that you would have to feel guilty about. Not thinking about sex, as in all things, destroys the past. You don’t need a priest. You don’t need confession. You don’t need a head shrink. You need privileged information, and you need to act on it. If you act when you should act, and then think about acting when that is proper, you’ll never need — what? — a psychiatrist, a pat on the back, a note from home, a… Well, anyhow, you wouldn’t need it.
*
If you’re lonely, stop it. I know, everyone goes through periods when they feel a little lonely, or distant from people out in ordinary life. Maybe it’s hard to find a new sexual partner — whatever. Simply stop being lonely. I’ve made no rule that you have to limit your social or sexual life. So, if you feel lonely, and you feel you’ve just tried everything to do something about it, then notice this: you haven’t. Go and do something new. Go do something the lonely part of you would never do. Look in the paper and find this week’s social event — even if it’s the weekly meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous — and go there. Pretend to be one. Or maybe you see a notice for a single parents’ club. You don’t have to have a child. Just go. Try it out. How’s that for something you’d never do? Or the monthly dance of the Alcoholic Deaf and Dumb People. Just go! I’m not suggesting this just so you can get out and do something new — which is always in order — I’m saying specifically, that if you feel lonely, you should pick out a group of people that the lonely you would never visit, and try to join in.
*
Establish a secret hermitage for yourself. You know what a hermitage is, don’t you? That’s a place where hermits hang out. And I don’t mean plural hermits — at least not at the same hermitage. A hermitage is a place where a hermit hangs out. You should establish one. A secret one. Room only for one. You can’t join a hermit club.
*
Alright… Stay free from debt. It bears repeating.
*
Next, enjoy what you really enjoy with no restraint, and no guilt. I mean that. You know what you enjoy, or at least you know when you’re exposed to it. I don’t care what it is — listening to music, going to the ballet, taking ballet, reading books, strumming on your guitar, whittling, sitting on your back porch and seeing how many spots on the ground you can hit when you spit — if there’s something in Life that you enjoy, you should do it. Do it with no restraint or guilt. Don’t feel like you’re wasting time, because you aren’t. Let me say something more that I didn’t add in the list itself: you should also find the pleasure of periodically giving it up.
Don’t ever try to give up something for good, or you’re a reformer. Ever try to live with a reformed anybody? No? Well, trust me. It isn’t what we’re up to Here. It’ll tie you up badly, maybe permanently. But you should periodically give up things you enjoy, just so you can feel the clean taste of it again once you start back up. Even the giving up of something can have an enjoyable taste, once you know how to do it. Remember that everything is molecular, and your pleasures, your hobbies, are as molecular as everything else. They constitute real chemical enjoyment, and This is not a spiritual sojourn into the world of hair shirts.
*
Do not let the blues into your Blue Circuit. This one’s so obvious that I almost didn’t even read it after I wrote it down.
*
Always remember the joy and the energy of good Yellow Circuit food. How often you’ve all been reminded of that, and yet, how easy it is to forget. Go out and learn something new, or stay home and learn something new. Crack a textbook you can barely understand. Stretch your brain, it helps everything stretch.
*
Do not waste anything. I don’t mention this much, because you have to See this for yourself, but it’s important. Humanity is not going to “use up” Life. We’re not going to destroy the planet by throwing beer cans on the highway, but you shouldn’t throw beer cans on the highway. For one thing, there are more attractive things to look at while you’re cruising pavement. Humanity won’t destroy the planet by wasting stuff, but you personally should not place unnecessary burdens on Life. Don’t leave lights on when nobody’s using them; don’t throw things out while they’re still usable. You have a pencil two inches long, and you accidentally drop it on the floor, and then rather than pick it up, you kick it in the trash because you’ve got five new pencils in your desk.
There’s a real reason for not doing that — a real molecular basis. Any way you can conserve energy and matter — even if there seem to be ample replacements around — you should do it. I’m not your father, and I’m not Ralph Nader. And I know, against the backdrop of all humanity, each person is just one cog in the wheel. Further, I won’t say whether Life appreciates in a “conscious” way any efforts you may make this way on its behalf. Just take it as I say it: you should not be putting any more strain on Life than necessary; not even a little bit.
*
Debate no one. Is that too fancy? Do not debate people. Is that too long? Don’t debate. Is that not “homey” enough? Don’t debate anything. Does that about cover it?
*
Next, if you are uncontrollably serious — for example, “seriously serious,” then be it known that you are on the wrong track. You’ve been temporarily D-railed. You’re attempting to look out the port side and, in your case, there ain’t no port side.
*
Don’t think about stuff that has only two sides. That’s a real jack-fact. I don’t care what it is: goodness, morality, politics, fiscal affairs, mergers, plane crashes, your mother’s health, your shoe size — whatever. Don’t think about anything that has only two sides. It’s worse than a waste of time, which is bad enough. It’s another form of poison. You’re wasting the stuff of you, you’re wasting the opportunity you have to gain something Here, with This. You’re spending the only currency you have Here: your energy. If it’s only got two sides, there’s nothing to think about. The only thing to think about it is, “Hey, that’s only got two sides. Next!” At that level, you’ve already got it whipped, although the rest of the world will continue debating all the two sides forever. Everybody else is still debating the nature of “good and bad,” for example, and you know more than Billy Graham, the Pope, and St. Augustine of Hippo — because you know it’s only got two sides. Knowing that, you know more than anybody else on this planet. You know it’s not going anywhere, no matter what it is, even if it’s a “pressing personal problem.” Don’t think about it; it’s a waste. I almost wish I hadn’t sprung the one on you about cursing yet, because this one deserves stronger words than just “a waste of time.”
*
Don’t be angry at a clock if you oversleep. I got into that one already, if you noticed. Don’t try to beat dirt to death because you tripped on it. I’m not joking, funny as some of these examples may seem while you’re not in the midst of doing them. This is a form of behavior that everybody is wired up to do. It’s part of being civilized. It’s part of the proof of being civilized. It’s part of the proof that you have higher circuits working. You wake up, finally, and try to get out of bed, and then you notice the alarm has been going off for the last thirty minutes and you’re half an hour late. The clock rang when you set it to ring, and unless you’ve got a very unusual clock, it wasn’t its business to pick you up bodily and throw you out onto the floor so you’d wake up. Yet you blame the clock — even if you do it in a relatively civilized manner by just cursing at it. It didn’t do it. You did.
For you people, there’s a real molecular danger in placing blame/responsibility elsewhere when it belongs to you. You may say, “C’mon, I was just joking, really. I just let go for a moment there. I know it was me and not the clock.” But even if you don’t externally say anything, yell, or hit the clock, you’ve taken the energy flow and let it go to the clock instead of keeping it for yourself. You shouldn’t oversleep anyway, whatever that may mean to you. In other words, if you need to wake up at a certain time, even if you only promised it to yourself, you should do it. Like other things, if you promise someone, and don’t mean it, then go hit the bed. But otherwise…
*
If you let the Blue Circuit feeling of “feeling sorry for yourself” become electrified up in the Yellow Circuit — if you think about it — you have, at that moment, ceased to have a self. I could point out what a self-fueling Tasmanian devil “feeling sorry for yourself” is, because there’s no end to the enjoyment you can get out of it if you accept the price. Life has told people, “It’s fun to feel sorry for yourself.” And sure enough, it is.
We’re running out of tape and time here. I’ll come back and pick up on this list some other time, unless I’m being totally insincere, and don’t fully mean it. Which doesn’t cover the options, by the way. I guess you’ll have to wait and see.