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Notes by CF
A Samurai looks at the Sins of the father
Begin: A handful of things from the ordinary and literary life struck me today. One of them is of men of great action such as the samurai. The samurai were professional warriors who, in essence, had no passion in what they did. There is a story of a samurai pointing out to his student that if he had any feeling (such as enjoyment or fear in defeating or killing his opponent) he was not a samurai. You cannot like or dislike your opponent. There is something in that (neither liking nor disliking your opponent) that touches people.
The last few days on the web page I mentioned the investigation of the crime and turning the investigation back on the investigator. I spent one of the days focused on the alleged crime and how difficult it is even prove a crime was committed. I received several messages from folks who said they thought they followed it but were not sure about the crime. The crime is that everybody thinks “Something is not quite right.” The closer you live to instinct the less this has any significance.
05:00 For people like us “the Investigation” is another metaphor for looking into the thinking that “Something is not quite right.” This (something is not right) is as if a crime has been committed. It may not be a felony but it could be a serious misdemeanor.
Man’s asleep, men are living in a dream, and the fall of man in the Adam and Eve story are examples of the crime. The thing about the crime (feeling something is not quite right) is you cannot find the perpetrator.
10:00 The minimum to be involved in this (trying to awake) is you are past any idea of the Gods, Humanity or our parents (barring genetics) having afflicted us. Whatever is bothering me is in me and there is nowhere else to look. This is the minimal position to try to awaken.
The most efficient way is the perpetrator has to be me. The crime that has been committed is one I committed. So now it appears “If I am the perpetrator what was my motive?” That question might get you on the right track.
15:00 Back to the samurai and being able to attack a foe without any passion. If you are the culprit, (You, being the mechanical operations of the brain, etc.) how can you use the stories of the Samurai to go about confronting yourself (the only opposition to the goal) dispassionately?
How can you go about wanting to wake up and not really care if you do or not? (Perhaps to harsh) How can you go about waking up when half of you don’t care to wake up and the half that cares about waking up doesn’t care that the other half doesn’t care. There is the trick. How can you be a samurai towards yourself taking in to account the above statement of halves is 50% illusory.
20:00 It seems you do not have a choice in this struggle to awaken. You do have a passion for this engagement to awaken and this passion seems to look at this mechanical part of the brain as the enemy.
I can let the rest of the world go to hell. I do not mind what anybody does. (Silly wars, etc.) I do not mind how stupid people are unless I am in a stupid mood. I do mind me being stupid. I forgive the rest of the world. I understand the rest of the world.
The question I present to you is “How can you go about being a samurai toward yourself?” I am saying that being a samurai toward yourself would be of benefit. If you do not do it (for those who get it) you are left with stopping thought with thought. You are left with two opposing forces of equal strength.
If you care about the other one you cannot overcome it. I was hoping someone would ask “Why is that?”
When it comes to the apparent problem, the crime, the thinking that something is not right what the investigation should be is not what’s bothering you but investigating what is it in me that is bothered by this.
You are not actually looking for the culprit or the one you think is the culprit. The culprit does not matter unless you can tell me its motive. Do not study the crime but study what is annoyed by the crime.
25:00 Who/What is annoyed. It is not who/what is bothering me. (I know you all personally so I can say this) You are an idiot if you think you know what is bothering you. You may say it is being mechanical but you do not know that. Nobody knows it. I say it but I do not know it.
If you look just right it will suddenly get you. No one investigates (that know one knows).
30:00 Somewhere in life, very shortly after you started talking, (everyone forgets this) but that explains the joke about the little child of about 2-3 years old. She was supposed to be talking by now and had never spoken a single word. She had perfect coordination, alert, etc. She gets to about 3-4 years old and the family starts talking to her doctors to see why she is not talking. The doctors cannot find any reason why she is not talking. Around the time she is 4 years old the parents and child sit down with some plates of food. The child’s first words are “Not broccoli again.” The parents are stunned and say “You can talk” They ask “You could talk all this time?” The child said “Yeah.” The parents ask “how come you never said anything?” The child said “well up until now everything was all right.”
I personally have found this joke to be one of the funniest jokes in the world.
I can see it. That everyone of us, a week or so after we started talking, that we were asked by an adult (parent etc.) (not a specific reason) “How is everything? From an adult’s view you have just become alive. Up until then you were just a dog with diapers on. Up until they asked you “How is everything?” everything was all right. But after they asked you how is everything? You say well, now that you mention it “something is not quite right.”
There it is “the sins of the father.” How do you know that something is not quite right? You are not expected to know. You have only been talking a week. That is probably the first serious question you confront. How is everything?
35:00 The rest of the world learns to live with it. (the thinking that something is not quite right) People like us don’t get over that something is not quite right. It follows us into adulthood. People like us are still wondering that something is not right and what is it that is not right. Very few people get beyond this.
There is no profitable conclusion to the above. Instead of pondering the thinking that something is not quite right turn your attention to who/what is in me that is annoyed by this.
Forget what ‘this’ is because nobody knows. It is just ad hoc verbalization. The conscious part of the brain running on autopilot fits but is not true because nobody know what is going on. It took me a long time to see it.
There is no answer to what is bothering you. The crime cannot be described. Most of the world does not care. If they are asked about the crime (something is not right) they will say “well, yeah.” People like us press on. Sooner or later you realize the investigation of the crime gets you nowhere. You do not know what the crime is or what is annoying you.
I seem to have a talent for making up these metaphorical pictures of what is bothering us. But I do not know because no one knows what is bothering us.
So here is the technique. Forget what is bothering you. Ask who/what is it in me that is bothered by the thinking that something is not quite right. There is the solution to the problem….. the explosion of the crime scene.
Jan’s Posted Daily Fresh Real News
January 29, 2001.
Monday, you say?! —
the day developed by the early alabamians to keep
sunday & tuesday from gettin’ all jammed up, and
too incestuous by twice.
What a day!
One man carried dual citizenship —
living in two separate places simultaneously.
In so doing he was obliged to give
allegiance to both equally —
yet he found himself favoring one of them,
in the sense of thinking about it more than the other.
Note: This weighted mental attraction did not alter his
living in them both equally — it merely
altered his subjective perception of the situation.
For many years did one man in search of
see the entire affair as being one of the mind,
with manifestations of unprofitable behavior
being a problem for children,
and unsophisticated seekers.
Over time and experience,
an unexpected possibility began to periodically,
and subtly creep up to the periphery of his campfire,
and on some nights would whisper:
What if it IS all just a matter of — behavior?!
Note: The opposite of every enlightening idea is
Ultimately, the most direct way to get to
the understanding is to — ACT NATURALLY,
and you know when you are not doing so
by the fact that the voice-over to your life will be talking about what you are doing
when you are NOT — acting naturally.
(What indeed if it does turn out to be
all a matter of behavior?! —
but with a whole new, expanded view
of the terrain where lies & meets
the twin territories of: Doing, and Thinking?!
The difference between those with
the understanding, and those without it is that
those without it think they know something.
The knowledge you think you have now
is not the real thing if you feel you are
something special by having it.
At odd times, one man would periodically
declare aloud to his troops:
Were gettin some where now, boys —
only problem is — I’m not sure WHERE?!?
And dipping again into the still-opened case file
of that previously noted: alleged-crime,
along with the: difficult-to-identify-culprit,
(if in fact there be one), there is to be found
yet another useful technique in unraveling this mystery: THE DISAPPEARING ACT approach —
whereby the investigator himself pulls a:
Judge Hoffa, a Jimmy Crater, a Camelia Airhead —
and thus are the facts of the case laid bare by
the disappearance of the illusionary investigation itself
which was what was keeping it from plain view
To himself, one man thought of his attempts to
GET AND HOLD THE UNDERSTANDING as:
Absolutely — NO Refunds!
(also known as the, infinitely cognizant country song:
“I’ll Never Take Me Back No Matter WHAT I Do.”)