Supreme Example of Secondary World–Money
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11/25/1992
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Condensed News Items = See Below
News Item Gallery = jcap 92134 -1054
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The News
Copyright 1992 J. M. Cox [1054] 92134
In a sense, thinking creatively is like speaking in a
foreign language — even to yourself.
***
This one city would let almost anyone who showed up help
unload the truck.
***
During one of “those kind of days” a man gazed out his
window and thought: “It’s hard enough being ordinary without
also having to be alive!” (He then looked out another window and
thought: “Or perhaps I have that backwards?…”)
***
To improve the odds and increase the possibilities, one man
began to always start the word “alternative” with a different
letter. “Remember,” the village tax collector told the happy,
anxious children gathered around him, “Magic only works if you’re
either dumb, or know what you’re doing.”
***
And courtesy of the above-ground — the way above-ground —
wire service of Kyroot, this “cheer-up” wake-up news note for
your early morning encouragement: Human institutions are smarter
than the members that make them up.
***
And now (said Kyroot) “O.G.L.T.” — “One Guy’s Latest
Theory” time: This one guy says he’s come to the conclusion that
all really nice people are from another planet.
***
And Kyroot made note of “The Rebel’s Trap Door”: While it
is “regulated growth” that is proper at the primary level,
intellectually, there are certain (shall we say) “other”
possibilities credible.
***
A viewer says: “Let me get this straight. You’re saying I
have my choice: I can either be dumb, serious, successful and
ordinary, or be a revolutionist! — (with whatever the hell
that brings with it)?!”
***
The secret trick of knowledgeable fools is not to try and
appear otherwise. Unrequested Corollary: At a certain level:
History’s wisest men were all idiots.
***
And now — “Our Inspirational Thought For Your Day, Not
Mine! — Yours!”: It is contained in this verse upon which one
man would muse, and sometimes sing:
“I have a formula
That doesn’t work,
But I don’t mind you see;
Everything is right on course
‘Cause it’s sec-con-dar-i-ly.”
***
And the hormones silently shouted: “Shut up! — ONWARD!”
…(and Kyroot noted: The above was not entitled: “Ode To
Civilization.”)
***
“Some More About Things And What They Are”: The collective:
A herd that can reason. The secondary: The primary with a
voice. And the universal is what is, and the local, that which
is going to be.
***
Instead of “2-4-1” drinks during “Happy Hour” at the Ole
Sorehead’s Bar & Bar, they’re now handing out little cheesy hors
d’oeuvres with this message squeezed out on top: ”Those with
talent want to sing — and those without want to shoot those
with.” …(One of the ole regulars complains that now they need
to install one of those “Poetic-Breath Analyzers” for the safety
of their patrons who may be driving.)
***
A viewer says: “I still don’t understand what was meant
by the possibility of all this just being made-up?!”
***
…and Kyroot said: Re the matter of “Destinations &
Journeys”: A destination doesn’t move — that’s why man is on a
journey.
***
To assist her DNA-tag-alongs in their entry into up-to-date-
life, a mother told the brood: “Although I understand full well
that the wiring even I’ve been able to pass along to you is
constructed such as to resist what I’m about to tell you, none-
the-ole-secondary-less, still try your best to sometimes remember
this: No matter who you are, or where you’re standing, when it
rains — the body gets wet, and it’s the mind that complains.”
* A man cannot sever his genes — but he can rent-his-
jacket, and a “U-Store It” to keep it all in. *
***
The strange Instructor who just “showed up” in class quickly
told the freshmen already seated: “Within the fiscal commerce of
the human mind resides the only currency that sets its own value
and regulates its supply to suit the needs known only to itself,
but guessed at by every two-bit trader alive…(which, I might
add, includes us all).” He bowed, and disappeared in a cloud of
interest rates.
***
…and Kyroot limned again: A revolutionist: What
everybody else wants to be after they die and go to heaven…
…(including, I suppose, a revolutionist).
***
The horde’s traveling philosopher one evening told the
warrior chief in private: “Knowledge that has an anchor, or that
has a particular view from a particular harbor is, under all
conditions, deleterious to a soldier, no matter how brave and
victorious on land, who wishes finally to ‘sail away’.” (And
Kyroot said): While this was certainly proper data under the
circumstances of the story, do continue to note how ordinary men-
and-minds could not begin to orient or navigate themselves with
such an approach.
***
Then from Kyroot (F.Y.S.E.O. — [For Your Sweet Ears Only]),
this: Morality is to behavior as collective wisdom is to actual
thinking.
***
…and also from Kyroot: The Sad Tale Of Many A Secondary
Career: A thigh broke my theory. * Even at the highest city
levels, in a battle between the primary and the secondary —
there ain’t much of a battle. * A cultured observer asks: “But
still shouldn’t we always strive to be more civilized?!” Yes
indeed sir — that is precisely what it is all about — the
journey.
***
Staring into his oatmeal the early morning man so pondered:
“If we blame our leaders for man’s stupidity we step onto
dangerous ground, for then we are saying that those smarter than
us are dumber than us.” And speaking to the sugar as he slowly
spread it, added: “No sir, I don’t like it at all.”
***
A viewer says: “If being ordinary is nothing to be ashamed
of, then why am I ashamed?”
***
Everybody’s roof has one leak.
…..this seemed to cause one man to muse: “Original thought:
‘The tar of the mind’, perhaps?!…
***
Peering inspirationally at his reflection in the toilet
bowl, a man said to himself: “The real danger in ‘melancholy’ is
that it tends to encourage in one either traits of a vegetable or
of a canine.” …(Poets take warning, red skies at morning…”,
and so on….) …Oh, and Commander Commode asked that he be
given the opportunity to remind you that: “Nothing, worthwhile,
flows downhill.” …(Thank you sir — I think we get the
point.)
***
Another of the neighborhood ole soreheads recently had this
to say: “Even compared to how he is now, I’ll bet if man
actually knew what was going on he’d be REALLY PISSED!” * Tip
For Intellectual Track-Hounds: Wagering is safe on games that
never end. *
***
…and Chef Boy-ar-kay measured: All food, universal — all
recipes, local.
***
Relatively speaking: A destination has an immediate and
conclusive payoff while a journey affords an ongoing reward.
***
Having no dog, on cold, dreary nights one man would have his
fears lay by his feet.
***
Axiomatic Conversation, Number 47, in E Flat: “Trips taken
freely are never troublesome.” “Alright, but there remains the
nagging question of: ‘What am I doing in this particular ticket
line?'” (“Attention! may I have your attention please: All
flights to Eden and Atlantis have been canceled, for reasons that
should be semi-clear even to the pea-brains among you. Thank
you.”)
***
A man stopped a young lad on a street corner with a firm
lapel-grip and told him: “Stay alert! — it is always the old
who claim that beauty lies only in the soul.” * More great art
has been produced, destroyed, dreamed-of, criticized, and
forgotten by hormones than by twenty truckloads of painters and
poets. *
***
A viewer says: “I don’t like it when you talk about ‘pea
Brains.'”
***
Several lines spoken, (aka, “Spoken Lines”): “Without hero
worship there is no religion.” “What’s your point?” “The cross-
town bus runs all night long.” “The buses never stop — what’s
your point?” “It’s hard to get men to accept patent foolishness
unless you charge them for it.” “Ah hah! — so that was your
point all along. Without hero worship there is no religion — I
get it now.”
***
An ole man told the kid: “You might note that the basis of
much of the verbal wrangling ‘twixt poets and critics, and even
between poets and poets, is unwittingly due to some men singing
odes to the beauty of the primary world, while others send up
praises to the joys of the secondary. Routine men and minds
perceive herein a real, ‘worthy-of-debate,’ distinction and
conflict, while our kind of transient rebel tenant
unprejudicially appreciates the creative charm of all possible
worlds be they physical or intellectual.”
***
…and Kyroot noted: The Royal Priest, in dealing with his
own son and in recognizing the dominant wiring pattern therein,
told him: “When mad, count to ten. When really mad, be sure and
aim the gun away from family members.” * Everyone’s genetic roof
has one aberration. *
***
One day as he considered the intellectual world around him,
and how others perceive it should be, a certain rebel mused: “If
swamp gas would ever solidify — the Everglades would become
Manhattan, and then where would the alligators find a room for
the night.” (And as a casual side note, Kyroot noted on the
side): Parables that use names of real people, places and things
are the most popular in that they’re easier to misconstrue. And
a viewer says: “Yeah, yeah!, but besides all that! — I’d still
like to see even a crocodile try and get a room at The Plaza on a
Friday without a reservation.”
…..and Kyroot said: SEE?!!
***
A local, secondary reality’s son asked: “I understand that
things must keep growing, but what if we run out of information?”
And his pa pa replied: “Simple!, we do what this family’s always
done! — we make up some more!”
…..A mayor’s nephew said: “Reality frightens me!” And His
Honor patted his head and said: “Then be sure and wear some
water tight undies if you want to confront the alternative.”
***
“Quiz For Rebel, Secondary-Consumers” (don’t bother trying
to figure if you’re included therein — if you’re alive and from
around here — you are): Who is dumber: He who purchases a
needed piece of equipment that proves to be of “bad design” — or
he who does so and then doesn’t improve on it? …(And a viewer
thinks: “If this actually has something to do with ‘thinking’ —
I don’t want to think about it!”)
***
A viewer writes: “When are you guys gonna have a good
scandal?” …(And even within the limited confines of cable
broadcasting — The metaphors keep a’comin’.) ** Taking
collective knowledge as real thinking is like eating, getting
full, and believing that’s the end of it. **
***
…And another viewer says: “My suggestion is that on some
nights you have only long Kyroots, and on others only short
ones.” (And Kyroot replies): Dear Viewer: We’ve already
recently covered that by noting that cold makes more than one
thing shrivel up.
***
Oh yeah (said Kyroot) you might also be interested to know
that today, for the first time, we were contacted by the Lobby
Lobby who said we should both, “Keep up the good work,” AND,
“Stop it!”
***
As his part of the evening’s program (“If not
entertainment,” thought he), he stood near the fire and made
these remarks: “Although we all acknowledge that this is
‘routinely’ not possible, still-&-all, a revolutionist must
become his own history.” (All those in attendance proved to be
both entertained and informed.)
***
And in between commercials, “Killer K., Your Hip-Hop Dee
Jay,” mentioned that the week’s hottest new record, (entering the
charts, in fact, at the big old number 12 position), is a song
entitled: “The Secondary World: The Only Place Men Freely Pay
For Goods Never Delivered.” (And a grouchy ole listener says:
“I’m not sure that number twelve on the list is high enough: I
think maybe I’d either ‘give it a bullet,’ or put a bullet in
it.”) In one broadcast area, you have a choice of either all-
music or all-talk radio, and to the surprise of those doing the
audience survey, most listeners weren’t thereof aware.
***
“Go Consider”: The universal can’t “send you home” because
it is your home; and the local tries to send you anywhere but.
***
Then, via his power-of-attorney, Kyroot explained: The
abundance, the multiplicity, the often-conflicting, some-times-
silly avocations of man are a natural result of him realizing
that the bus is going nowhere in particular.
***
In one land they decided that the first man who could spit
in his own ear would be king. (It would prove that he was
turning the fastest.)
***
A viewer asks: “What does having a teeny mind have to do
with it?”
***
One man began to call himself “Professor Wilson” to try and
throw stupidity off his trail. (And if you believe it worked,
then I have a block of discounted, reptile resort tickets I can
lay on you cheap.)
***
A viewer writes: “I’ve become quite upset by the whole
affair.”
***
Just before birth, a seditious mama told her upcoming,
offspring: “Two things, Charlie, to remember: Never offer
criticism, and never say how you feel.” And the little “yet-to-
fully-be” one said to himself: “That sure don’t leave much, do
it?!…Do it?!….Hey!, where’d you go?!”, not realizing that he
was too young to yet have a self.
***
Once, strictly in private, a rebel thought: “My genes are
a’janglin’ — my soul is adrift, and my mind soars onward! –Far,
always — far, far away from where I am, I am.”
***
The class visitor so addressed remarks to the students:
“Critics, politicians, and the church all act as anchors to
safely secure the uncertain little boats that are our very
souls.” And a wild-haired kid, left-aisle, far-corner muttered:
“Somebody gimmie a knife.”
***
As he re-entered the city a man mused: “Knowing how to
think is better than a letter of recommendation.”
***
As compared to a destination — a journey doesn’t have to be
reliable.
***
One ole sorehead so advised his eldest son: “On the thorny
path of life, compliments are like the roses we pass to one
another. …(And always send ’em collect!)” And a, (that),
viewer says again: “I don’t know which is the stronger with me:
My dislike of your reference to ‘pea-brains’ or your nice stories
about ‘ole soreheads.’ (P.S.: Save your breath telling me to,
‘Go figure!’.) Yours,” etc.
***
Warning! — “Proverb Update” just ahead — No! — Oh my god!
— it’s already on us!: “Men never repent having eaten too
little, nor having too stupid been.” (Quick! — run for your
proverbial wits!)
***
The City’s official “Secretary In Charge Of Success,
Stability, Sanity & Good Looks,” in a noontime speech to a group
at the Five Hundred Forum, mentioned this in the middle of his
official mumblings: “A man with peculiar ideas is asking for
trouble.” (And I can assure you that the kind of men partaking
of sustenance at a private club the ilk of the “Five Hundred”
understood exactly what he meant!) Then, just after the soup,
but just before the salad, metaphors were served to a few: “In
certain important corridors-of-power windows are extant for the
sole purpose of having ready openings from which to throw
artists.”
***
His uncle told the prince: “A man who’ll entertain
‘personal questions’ was looking for them.”
***
Even though to keep the secondary banquet alive and well
everyone must eat their own feet, a rebel’s appetite and needs
are so beyond such that civilized diners don’t even care to
hear-r-r about it.
***
…and Kyroot noted: The cities continue to insist: “To be
‘non-serious’ is totally unbecoming.”
…..in his defense of having cursed the city, a kid said: “He
started it!”
***
An observing correspondent writes: “It seems to me that
man’s poetic efforts went awry as he began to less verbally
caress the: Joys of sex, the pleasures of comfort and repose,
the beauty of nature, and began to rhapsodize on death.” (And on
page 2 he added, “I sense the inevitability of this process, but
to one private man here, it still seems something of a loss.
Yours, No Less Onward,” etc.)
***
Then, from that green box of descriptions he keeps behind
the door, Kyroot removed & read this one: Ordinary thought:
Book ends. Rebel thought: Books.
***
In part — through “self-reference” — the universal makes
journeys appear to actually “go somewhere”.
***
The Strange Metaphysics Of Bus Travel: Once on board, the
dumb wear their ticket out-t-t!
***
A viewer asks: “What’s the difference in: Thinking-more-
than-you-have-to, being crazy, thinking-creatively, beings nuts,
thinking-individually, being insane, thinking-without-a-
destination, and just being mad and deranged? — Have I made
myself clear?!” Sir Viewer: Does a whale have a wang to die
for?! …(A sub-contractorial viewer says to himself: “Is being
distracted the same as having your question answered?” Dear Sub-
Viewer: Does “Yes” begin with a “Y”?!)
***
Money could be seen perhaps as the most revealing example of
the secondary world: Something of no intrinsic value that
everybody wants.
***
And from some other desk than that of Kyroot comes this
item: Confusing Mathematics In Four-Four Time: Either: More
people don’t have to “take-this-crap” than say they don’t — or,
more could say they don’t than now do. Local life is many, many,
(and often, “many unrecognized”) things: Magnanimous, and
generous are two, dumb and stupid are not.
***
As he cruised along the highway of life on his chopped-and-
dropped, shaved-and-paved, raked-and-scraped, extended-and-up-
ended, intellectual “low rider,” the biker thought and hummed to
himself: “Really good proverbs are like industrial strength
rubbers — they almost never wear out!” (And thus primed, began
to sing to himself in serious earnest):
“Many are called,
But few are chosen;
Scores are chilled,
While scant are frozen.”
(And just about then his brain indicated that it was just about
time to put on his helmet — [what with the cool evening breeze
and all].)
***
Then (opening with a joke) Kyroot said: Forgive me for
being metaphorical, but: What is a revolutionist if not his own
civilization! — internal — made complete!
***
At certain times this certain rebel would privately remind
himself: “Man!, if the local looks this good — just imagine the
beauty of the universal!” …(And a voice added: “It’s almost
enough to make a man actually want to go-somewhere.”)
***
A viewer says: “Trying to follow what you say is like
trying to zip up your jacket in a wind when you’re not wearing a
jacket.”
***
A man thought: “I’ll write a book composed of nothing but
things viewers have said…but I don’t have any viewers!”
* Moral: Everybody has viewers. *
…..then a viewer asks: “And why is it so hard for us to
realize and use this?”
***
…and Kyroot notes: A middle aged gent over in the sixth
precinct continues to experience extreme difficulty in his
attempts to expedite the affairs of his life in that his brain
cannot seem to make the proper distinction between the concepts
of a “short cut,” and a “shot put.” …(The neighborhood doctor
says that while this is not a totally unknown medical phenomenon,
he’s never heard of it, and doesn’t know what it means.)
A certain well-heeled, ward heeler remarks: “Carrying
another on your back may not bar you from the field trials, but
it sure makes betting on yourself an ‘iffy’ proposition.” (“Dear
Miss Etiquette: Is, ‘throwing-your-life-away’ the same thing as
throwing yourself away?” [Signed]: “Semi-Anxious & Conscious.”)
A previously “middled aged” gent over in the sixth precinct
says: “Enough already! — I’m now damn near retirement!” (“Dear
Advice Doctor: Is being ‘worn out’ anything like actually having
your questions answered?”)
***
The secondary cannot be beautiful without words — nor is it
meant to be. Thus can sex be silent — but not friendship.
***
Destinations, full —– journeys, always hungry.
***
Day before yesterday in city park, with no small amount of
flurry and ruckus, a new man took center stage on the soapbox in
the speaker’s area and said to the crowd: “There are only three
basic types of human that have ever been alive on this planet —
and I’m not going to tell you what they are!”, and left.
***
A man who heard all about the revolution thought: “There’s
more to it than that.”
***
And now, (intoned the tone-deaf Kyroot), our, “Theological
Humor Of The Day”: A viewer writes: “A brief viewer is a happy
viewer.” And another viewer writes: “A really brief viewer is a
REALLY
…(And a local god adds: “Hey! I got chur humor hangin’!”)
***
A lad writes to ask: “Dear Miss Etiquette: I am a lad and
I’d like to ask: If we said that the brain is the destination
would thoughts then be the journey?” And Miss Etiquette said:
“Good boy — good boy.”
***
And a second lieutenant made this observation:
“Unconventional, creative thinking, unlike ’tis said of beauty,
does not intoxicate both the beholder and the possessor; in a
rebel thinker’s case, it is usually limited to the latter.
…(A bird colonel, cooling his coffee at an adjoining
table, gazed up through the steam as he again smiled in joy at
the myriad ways by which man’s intellectual world feeds and
protects itself.)
***
There is nothing universal comparable to seriousness. (The
closest thing would be the re-fitting room.)
***
In private — “subtle,” a rebel ain’t.
…..and as they trudged ever onward through the muck, mud and
mire, one city general said: “I know — I’m just sure I really
know what brought us here.” * In private — “subtle,” a rebel
ain’t. *
***
The original is always beautiful to the one who counts —
its creator.
***
The grammatical basis of the revolutionist sense of humor is
in the absence of periods.
***
Then Kyroot offered a type of “1812 Overture finale” HINT,
(that’s spelled: H, I, N, T): The combined perception &
understanding of our rebel pictures of: the universal begetting
the local, the primary producing the secondary, and now — the
seditious distinction between the destination and the journey,
would afford one’s brain the ability to see why its ancestors
came up with such notions as a “Fall from Grace,” or, “Being
driven from Paradise,” along with the dreams of someday, somehow
being able to return to this all-but-forgotten home. In the
final analysis — this is what life is all about, while in the
rebel version, it is not.
***
Then, someone or the other, apparently dressed up as, “Ole
Uncle Kyroot,” seemed to have said something resembling this, (I
say! — are they giving out awards again this year for
“Conditionalism,” and “Outstanding Provisional Vagueness”?!),
well, this is what I thought the person, (whoever he was), said,
any way: “The truly most instructive and exact stories regarding
the origins of man, and the purpose of his continued existence,
are all too bloody, shocking, and potentially destructive to be
told to the children…see, that’s why you’ve never heard them.”
(The small classified ad on the bottom of the last page said:
“Man with pea-brain seeks woman with borscht-heart.”)