If Everyone Knows Something Is Fake, It Is Not Fake
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#985 Jun 15, 1992 – 1:15
Notes by TK
Kyroot to :39. Fashion w/o criticism doesn’t exist.
If everybody knows something is fake, it is not a fake.
Even a hermit needs a companion, even if it is a renewed version of himself.
The Primary Level World needs no bookkeeping; the Secondary Level World is made up by man and requires accounting as proof of progress.
“Alone” is a metaphor. // additional comments, audio only, to :15.
Instead of calling it “The Final Edition” this one newspaper
labeled their last run of the day as the, “Unfortunately Not All
Of The Uncertainties Have Been Resolved” edition.
Fashion, as a hobby, is in the same category as complaining.
Institutions have no sense of humor…which is one reason
they are institutions, and another reason men need them.
…and Kyroot noted: When you hear it said that
“Everything’s probably for the best,” it usually turns out to be
a Philistine’s best guess.
One guy’s mind forbade him to read any book concerned with
the, “Less is more,” and the “Small is beautiful” theories.
As history rolls on it becomes better and worse.
…and somehow Kyroot mentioned: To talk about art is to
talk at its most talkative.
…..then, after thinking about it for a bit, someone asked,
“But how about ‘talking about one’s self’?…”
On one world when you die your bones turn into rocks for
kids to kick and toss around.
…standing in for Captain Obvious, Kyroot noted: The
secondary world won’t stay put — thoughts won’t stand still.
When he was just a wee lad one ole man told his kid, “Now
I’m not going to tell you stories about goblins and witches and
the like — why should I when you’ve already got you.”
If everyone knows it’s a fake, it’s not a fake.
Vis a vis the ordinary life of the city, for a hermit to
live he must have companionship…even if it’s just his renewed
After surveying some of the experiments of his neighbors
this one king scoffed, “Given the right to vote the first thing
the people say is, ‘Now what do we do?'” (And his Prime Minister
mused, “Similar to what occurs regarding thinking.”)
Silliness needs no defense until it wants to change its
…..and a viewer writes: “Instead of saying ‘silliness’ I
think it would sound better to perhaps use a word like,
‘insouciance’.” Signed, “Just Trying To Help.”
Once they had decided to do a comedy film the first thing on
the agenda was to compile a list of such adjectival phrases as,
“unbelievably funny,” and, “non-stop hilarity” to use in their
advertising so that their target audience would have no doubt as
to what results they could expect from the movie makers’ efforts.
(When a near by religion heard of this approach the head priest
kicked their P.R. man’s ass all around the rectory for not having
thought of it for them. …[Show biz side bar: All good
magicians, executioners, and silent rebels know that the proper
procedure is to: Tell ’em what you’re gonna do, do it, then tell
’em that you did it, and take your bow. …(Short, sweet, and
…and to help commemorate Official City Day Kyroot
observed: A man with a “serious question” has a gun; …it’s not
loaded, but it is pointed at himself.
…..and a viewer asks: “Is the threat of being stupid just as
good as the real thing?”
Once they’d fed the chickens and cleaned up the bathroom one
ole man told the kid, “Anything you ever feel’s your ‘divine
duty’ ain’t necessarily any part of the revolution.” …(He was
given to understatement.)
From behind some bushes next to the city Steam Factory a man
was telling passers-by, “Those who believe in some sort of human
‘free will’ are also those who would say that were not maggots in
bad meat born, they’d have no taste for it.” …(The connecting
rod between the piston of behavior and the crankshaft of thought
remains to ordinary minds, as elusive today as it did when man
first spoke of it.)
…..”Indeed, indeed,” added the cosmic village cobbler, “From
their normal vantage point the soles cannot determine from whence
cometh their primary ally in locomotion — the ground, or the
…..and as he leaped, and twirled, and lunged, he sang to
himself, “It takes two to tango, two to tango; even if you’re
one, it takes two to tango.”
Once the man and the god had agreed on the wager itself, the
deity killed him, explaining that at that point the game was
already over any way.
An artist who requires certain specific materials is like
a…well, you know, like an “artist” in quotation marks…an
artist with a long-g-g way to go, and you know — like that.
One chap says he’s thought, and pondered and reflected and
all of that, and now feels he’s damn close to the end of it if
just one final question will be answered for him: He wants to
know: Were spices discovered by those with sensitive taste, or
jaded? …(Query for your own time zone: If only rebels can
think revolutionist thoughts, what matters it if such efforts are
banned, or encouraged?!)
…..The revolutionist, thinking revolutionist thoughts, is
saved from much history and future.
On the second day of the convention the two o’clock speaker
in the Cotillion Ballroom told his audience, “When you’re not
looking, rats pop their heads up out of the water in your toilet
bowl.” And a man nudged his brother in law, “Did he say ‘mind,’
or ‘toilet bowl’?”
…then speaking to a large, randomly collected audience
Kyroot said: There is actually nothing to worry about, but
that’s certainly no reason not to.
Conversation overheard near the edge of a cerebral bandstand
(the guy with a baton says): “The thing is that no matter how
great the music, when you’re the orchestra leader you never get
to dance.” And the man to whom he spoke replied, “Jeeze! what
are you, nuts?!” …(Thus was the concept of martyrdom hatched
— [in 3/4 time].)
One guy told his own primary world, “You take care of your
end and I’ll take care of mind.” …(Thus was born the concept
of, “Don’t you wish.”)
…then, apparently not quite ready to abandon it just yet,
Kyroot offered an alternative version of that bumper sticker he
mentioned last time that’s making the rounds over in that city
you guys don’t like to hear about: “Life’s A Bitch — And Then
They Make You Pretend To Be Dead.”
After a considerable journey through the marble mental
hallways of city thought, a lad retreated therefrom long enough to
ask himself: “If the admission of ignorance proves a man’s
intelligence then how can you recognize the ignorant?” …(As he
continued in this fashion the boy did not attempt to avoid
mirrors, but neither did he take them to be of any consequence.)
…and for the real rebels in the crowd Kyroot pointed out
that: “alone” is a metaphor.
Before he would allow things to go any further this one king
demanded to know if art came from the artist’s hands, or from his
mind. …(An undersecretary mused, “If fingers and thumbs could
think aloud, he’d not have to ask such a question!…or would
he?…” …[And Kyroot noted: So long as genes remain inaudible
to ordinary ears, men won’t know where any thing actually comes
One guy’s latest notion is; “Under the right conditions
having fun inside is as much fun as having fun outside.”
…two gods were talking and one of them said, “What I like
about creatures who won’t give up is that they’re so annoying.”
As the generals pondered going into battle, the Royal
Thought Supporter gathered them into a circle and said, “A
ventriloquist with splinters in his throat is not necessarily the
voice-of-reason.” …(A Sorehead’s Corollary: Any one who talks
to them self is in an act with a dummy. …[And a man objects,
“But I can’t throw my voice.” That’s quite all right sir, even
the brightest of volcanoes can’t move fast enough to escape their
…..then Kyroot entered the fray by saying: If you could get
there from here, here would be called there.
Many minds continue to look upon human life as being in a
hospital, yet none ever seem to wonder, “What in the holy-hell
kind of accident could it have been to put us all here?!!!”
…(Moral In Traction: Having important, serious thoughts with
the ordinary mind is like sky-diving from a bus.)
As he waited outside the Ole Sorehead’s Bar for the Statute
Of Limitations to run out so that he could go back in, one of the
regulars was telling a buddy, “One of the things that drives the
rich is that once they get there then they can afford to pretend
that they’re not as dumb as the rest of us.”
…..then, just as he glanced up he heard a voice say, “All
right, you have your choice; you can either be wealthy and
powerful and keep the mind you now have, or be given the ability
to think anew, and take your chances.” And the man said,
“Hey!… is this a trick choice?!”
…..one guy (who was actually two guys) was talking to himself
and said, “Ahh, being ordinary’s not so bad.” “Yeah,” he
replied, “cause if you are you’ll never realize it any way.”
Instead of going down to city park and addressing the crowd
in the speaker’s spot, one man called all of his family together
in the laundry room and told them this, “Things that seem to go
together, do — but so what!” …(His youngest son thought,
“Phew! — the answer to that might be the answer to every
Whenever it’d rain this one guy’d get wet; after many years
of reflection on this matter, he developed a whole philosophy
based thereon; guess what he called it?
“Hey!”, said the Hey Man, “when it comes to history, or
current events, you can say anything you want to. Hey!”
Then joining tonight’s activities unilaterally, the Advice
Doctor up and said: “Although ’tis been claimed that everything
that could happen has happened, you might care to note that there
is no record of rats and penguins ever appearing in the same
parable.” …(“And thanks be the gods,” rejoiced the Viewer’s
Choir, “thanks be the gods.”)
When ever there appeared a new, tangled theory in the arts
or social sciences there were several people at the university
who would take a copy of its magnum opus to a certain rebellious
thinker who hung around the park, and he’d always glance over
the various works for about the same amount of time, and say, “I
understand what they’re doing.” — that was all; he never
offered any interpretation, or criticism of what he’d read, or
revealed his feelings in any way, just said, “I understand what
they’re doing.” …(He was able to do this externally from
having learned to do so within.)
The city chap who has undertaken to revive the discipline
once known as, “The Philosophy Of March Music” recently handed
out this mimeographed message: “Inside of every bass drum is a
story — just dying to get out.”
The Problem: Kabul always seems important for those who’ve
never been further east that Istanbul; The Solution: Go the hell
further east that Istanbul.
Then immediately after he died, as many had predicted, he
discovered that there was an after-life place of punishment, and
that he was apparently there, when the announcement was made to
all of those standing about with him that they should “come on
in,” that the eternity of “serious discussions & lectures” was
about to begin.
A certain ole man told the kid, “Son, at one level it’s moot
to worry about whether you’re becoming ‘too commercial,’ maybe
even ‘selling out,’ for when it comes down to it we’re all flaks
…..and this fax just in from a viewer: “I must agree with
that gentleman you recently mentioned who addressed a
Psychologists’ Convention as his words might apply to your
program (to wit): I fell there is entirely too much reference
(overt and otherwise) to molecules, and cells and stuff like
that. Sincerely,” etc.
…..oh yeah, less than an hour later that same viewer sent in
another message wherein he apparently tried to update an old adage
to fit the views he expressed toward our activities (he said):
“Those whom the gods would distract they first make think of man
as a real live, physical creature.”
Once this one guy had figured out, more or less, how things
were working, first thing every morning he’d say to himself,
“Okay, today’s script calls for me to be me, and do mostly ‘me
stuff,’ then when that’s over and night comes, I’ll stop and go
The purpose of human institutions is to fight for dominance.
…..Most sentences over ten words long are too long.
The Whisper Man down in el alleyway has this to alley-say:
“Man’s concern over the possibility of him destroying the planet
sounds suspiciously to me like Earth telling itself a joke.”
As they huddled in a closet the king told his henchmen, “We
must protect ourselves at all costs!” And the dorsal fin of his
ancipital lobe thought, “Well that is the normal going rate.”
…..As they strolled past the sanitation depot the kid asked
the ole man, “If there is any real fairness in life then in a
crash why will a dumb man put his arms up to protect his head
same as an intelligent one?”
Once this one man had fully grasped the nature of the Great
Trinity of fun, seriousness, and original-thought, he reversed
the normal neural work schedule, and had intellectual happy-hour
48 hours a week, and was serious only between four and six p.m.
On the city station, “Radio Routine Outlook,” the early
morning announcer said, “The news from nowhere today my friends
if bleak, bleak, bleak.” …(And the people were simultaneously,
sorely sore, afraid, upset, pissed, and darn well satisfied.)
One man noted: “What I like best about my dog is that he
never wants to talk about what happened yesterday.”
…then Kyroot delivered, for a boxer just over the hill,
this one-two, punch-er-roo: Those on a pension will continue to
buy new clothes even while starving their mind; everybody’s on a
pension. …(And from our viewers comes this letter: “Dear
Kyroot: If I asked you ‘what to think,’ and you told me, and I
did it, would I then be a neural revolutionist?” …and Kyroot
said: “I’m not going to answer this; I just read it so that you
could for yourselves.”)
…then Kyroot dished out this Maxim Update for The Rebels:
There is a time for everything — and now’s not the time.
Were there not continually new questions and new answers
there could be no secondary world; (and without half of that
arrangement, no revolution either.) …(A caretaker wants to
know if this should be filed under, “Don’t You Believe It!”)
…then Kyroot listed The Two Views: Criticism: The breath
of life; Criticism: Bullets.
…..a viewer asks: “If that physician you mentioned was
correct, and the human brain does not have any feeling, then how
can you know when you’ve been shot there?!”
…..and furthermore, Kyroot used this opportunity to exemplify
“The Two Twos” thusly: Another viewer asks: “What did you do
before you were on television?” — I wasn’t on television.
The serious don’t know how to be serious.
The guy and his dummy gave the crowd just a taste of their
act: The guy says: “Those with ‘nothing to lose’ù are a ‘dime a
dozen’.” And his partner replied: “Yeah, and stuff that came up
missing, and was later found cost only half as much.”
…(Obscure show biz truism: A mind is an impossible thing to
waste…if you’re alive.)
Near a knoll the dialogue flowed: “To eventually ‘return
home’ is to know the ole place anew.” “But to what advantage,”
countered the other, “if your birth place was a pig sty, or
…..from the annuals of Comedian’s Lore: What was the world’s
very first punch line? — Telling ordinary men that they should,
“Know thy self.”
Once the kid in the Quirky Kingdom began to realize his kid-
ness he thought, “Having something to look forward to is almost
as good as having nothing.” …(To himself, he always considered
the word “almost” as being extremely conditional and incorrect.)
…and in celebration of National Neural Rebel’s Day Kyroot
said to tell you this: It’s actually rather simple: Everybody
else thinks one way while a revolutionist wants to think another.
…(One guy delivering the fireworks mumbled, “Too simple if you
Some Uncodified Rules Of The Road for one world: Those who
don’t know what they’re doing intellectually will pretend that
they do; no one knows what they’re doing intellectually except
mathematicians, and other men who made up their own game.
…..and a gentleman sends this note to our show: “I feel that
many of your interesting ideas would go over better if you’d
give more examples when you mention them. Respectively Yours, (Oh
yes, a little ‘P.S.’: My brother thinks it would help even if
you’d just use more adjectives and adverbs.)”
In lieu of a regular religion this one man has a belief
instead; he believes that a man with convictions will spit on
…then on the board Kyroot wrote: The bully always wins,
right up to the time of death, after that it’s a tie.
His Secret Adviser reminded the king: “A raid on maps is
not an assault on geography.”
…..a prince was once asked, “Which would you prefer: To be
insulted, or attacked?” And he replied, “Which one hurts the
“Say, look here,” said an ole man to the kid, “the whole
point of having a hobby is not to take it seriously!”
The head librarian fumed to the dewy eyed assistant; “An
autobiography that is not self-serving should have never been
allowed in the non-fiction section to begin with!”
This one swan had his own song; he called it his “Goose
song” (he’s not into cliches).
…and Kyroot noted: From our particular view, there is no
art in the city — only the business of art. …(And although it
wasn’t necessary a man wonders, “Does this explain the paucity of
All good ideas are of indeterminate length…short, but
Warming to the conditions one man said, “Ahh! — if I felt
any worse I could be a poet. …Ahh! — if I felt any worse and
were better educated I might could even be a literate one.”
History is strung and held together by man’s neural network.
A man who will explain himself has got a lot of explaining
…and Kyroot mentioned this advice one rebel gave to his
The thoughts of others are glue,
To hold them together — not you.
…..and a viewer reacted to this by wondering, “Is that why
it’s so difficult to export info?!…”
…..and yet another viewer found this all moved him to suddenly
think: “That kinda takes the wind right outta the sails of
history and philosophy…and everything else (thank god).”
Many ordinary men’s dreams of an after life paradise is one
of a place where they might be able to somehow be a little
original under safe, controlled conditions. …(Withal, their
nightmares of a hell is then one of a place where “anything
The existence of ethics proves the lack of being civilized.
…..and Kyroot continued: The existence of religion proves the
lack of thoughtfulness.
…..and Kyroot added: The existence of stupidity proves
Just then a lad spoke up and said, “Being human sure seems
like a ‘big deal’.” (And his father injected, “The key word here
would be ‘seems’.”
It’s hard not to be a plagiarist if you live in the past.
…..and a viewer asks: “Dear Kyroot: Would you repeat that
last one?” Sure: It’s hard not to be a plagiarist if you live
in the past. “Dear Kyroot,” the viewer then adds, “shouldn’t you
really say, ‘…if you live in the past too much!’?” Nope!, not
When ever a rebel runner spies a Finish Line he’ll close one
eye and peel off obliquely.
One guy was an education unto himself. …(He also had the
fortitude not to ever say, “What a guy!”)
And one kid prayed, “Oh god!, don’t ever let the
revolutionist win an award.”
The art is not in the dance, but in the choreography.