Jan’s List of Important Discoveries
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Jan’s Posted Daily Fresh Real News
JAN’S DEEP FRIED, EXTRA CRISPY NEWS
Fingers Are Not The Only Things To Be Licked
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February 22, 2002. © 2002: JAN COX
There is a CertainQuirk to human life that everyone recognizes and is disturbed by, but which no one will truthfully name.
Man’s oldest told tales are stories of TheQuirk — indeed,
the history of man is the history of TheQuirk.
Save physical transgressions,
all complaints men register against one another are due to TheQuirk;
whenever you hear angry, accusatory words, The Quirk is responsible,
also with defensive, exculpatory ones.
At the heart of all culture is TheQuirk;
without it there would be no refinement of emotions, manners & tastes,
nor would mind have the ceaseless impetus to expand;
were it not for TheQuirk — there would be no Civilized Man.
If everyone is aware of its inescapable presence and sees what it is,
why is TheQuirk never called what it is? –
from earliest times it has not been, and is still not today.
Men realize that TheQuirk exists no where else in nature;
not in other animals; not in plants; not in the laws of physics;
no where else he can see in the universe does TheQuirk exist except in man –
and yet after thousands of years he still will not call it what it is?! –
……should not someone find that mildly interesting?
Oh, men do have names for it,
it is not that they ignore TheQuirk, (not possible),
no no — they run to it — they wallow in it — they relish it (no choice),
it is just that they refuse, (or are not allowed to) — call it what it is.
Who knows?! — life probably has some purpose for this charade,
but since everyone knows what is really going on in public,(and goes along with it),
why are they not permitted in private — just to themselves —
to acknowledge the reality of the situation?
Why forbid actors, who know they are making-believe,
to admit even to themselves the truth of what is going on?
Since TheQuirk is so obvious and omnipresent in everyone’s life,
why the prohibition against men simply acknowledging it for what it is?
The mass of humanity inherently has no interest whatever in the reality behind
what has above been said about TheQuirk,
in fact there is an innate mortal disinclination to even hear it talked about
in such a cold blooded manner;
TheQuirk is the animus of the civilized life that is man’s alone;
the joie de vivre to all the cultural activities he enjoys,
and it is as though men instinctively resist or will ignore things said about it
that come too close to its correct description.
Skoal! — to TheQuirk!
* * *
One day the King introduced to Court his son who he said would entertain them,
and called for everyone’s attention as his progeny began to sing.
No long into his singing did a restlessness start to stir in the audience,
and eventually a disgusted voice was heard to mutter: “Mutherfucker!”
which instantly brought The King to his feet;
he stopped the song — pointed to his son and demanded:
“Who told the singer he is a mutherfucker?”
No response.
Then even louder cried: “Who told the singer he is a mutherfucker?”
Silence,
and growing angrier still, The King declared:
“No one will leave here alive until we know who told the singer he is a mutherfucker”
He glared around the room which was quiet and still — ’til
a figure in back began to fidget, and The King yelled at him:
“Was it you who told the singer he is a mutherfucker?” and came the reply:
“No, I am not the one who told the singer he is a mutherfucker,
but I would like to know — who told that mutherfucker he is a singer.”
Court life inside every man’s head;
the singing & the listening;
the hormones & the neurons;
the King-of-consciousness & his off-spring:
the finality & the infinity of: doing & story-telling —
— TheQuirk.
“Hey — who the hell told me what being conscious is in the first place?!”
call it! — quick!
J
The most important ingredient to being normal & ordinary is to treat unimportant things as though they are important.
…..(This also applies to being asleep and stupid.)
…..metaphor is