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Jan’s Posted Daily Fresh Real News
June 18, 2001.
(Part 5 of a conversation.)
They had driven into town early that morning to pick up some supplies,
without either having said anything, (which was not uncommon),
but on the way back, with the top down, and the sun well up,
the father began again to speak to the son on that certain subject.
The deep longing some men have to change the
modus operandi of their mind
is an unrealized desire for a – pre verbal I.
He took a sip of the coffee they had brought with them,
and after adjusting the outside mirror, continued.
As I have noted: there are various ways to analyze & describe
what is actually behind that feeling that drives the few;
the sensation of living with a mind that is routinely half asleep, hypnotized, or otherwise, annoyingly distracted & on a lark of its own,
but a fresh & potentially quite explosive view of what is going on
is to look at it as the desire for a — pre verbal I.
From your reading you are aware that it has been long common
among the so-called, schools-of-enlightenment & awakening
to say that men do not naturally possess a, real individual I
but rather are afflicted with a number of false, fragmented,
and warring Is which he has acquired either because of
poor parenting, bad habits, or a curse from the gods,
and their assertion is that, awakening will finally produce in a man,
a single, stable, I that is a true representation of what he really is.
The notion is quite captious,
and as always with such not without foundation.
The explanations offered for this condition,
and the methods proposed to correct it
vary from place to place, but all in common clutch the idea that
what disturbs the few and converts them to the goal of wanting to, wake up — almost instantly upon first hearing about it —
is their lack of having a permanent, dependable I, (or, self),
to guide them through their mortal existence.
After the establishment of this playing field,
the rules of the sundry games become mostly forms of
mental entertainment & socializing;
their theories of what being asleep is,
and their proposals of what awakening will be
reflect the fragmented, conflicting, false Is of their
initial conception of mans world of the mind
but it can be seen & approached much more directly.
All the historical paths to inner liberation have also had harsh words for
they routinely condemn much of human speech to be blabber & palaver, and identify it as emblematic of mans sorry,
snoozing state of mind:
that he so lacks a self-controlled, solid, one-I-ed-consciousness
that he talks constantly, and is mostly incorrect in what he says — and
is in such a pitiful & watered-down state of consciousness
that he is not even aware that he is doing it.
Again — a view, not sans substance,
but I present to you today, my boy,
a looking that is blunt & to the point —
a straight hammer blow to the head.
The desire to, wake-up & be enlightened is the longing for a —
pre verbal I.
While engaging in meaningless talk,
and talking knowingly about things you do not understand
certainly stand between a man and an alteration in his consciousness,
go beyond that — deeper into the matter — just past the surface.
I tell you this — and I mean it as plainly as it sounds:
almost ANYTHING that a man says
will make him appear an idiot to an awakened mind.
Almost any words that an ordinary, sane, educated human being might say about anything — will, to a mind that knows,
reveal him to lack the slightest comprehension of what life is about, and what is going on constantly around him — and in him.
The idiocy, the foolishness, the uselessness is not merely in the
excessive quantity, nor even in instances wherein what is
said is identified as being in error.
Those who sincerely believe that they want to escape their present state — mans ordinary, common & collective state of mental operation,
continually think that they make meaningful comments regarding,
the condition of civilization, of other men, and of themselves,
and without any exceptions, to a liberated mind, everything they say
makes them appear as fools, (and of course you know I do not,
in our conversations, use such otherwise derisive terms as insults
to other humans, [who none & all are in need of such], but do so
somewhat theatrically to try and snap your attention to) —
and yet — in a completely impartial & impersonal manner,
everything that an ordinary man says about anything he perceives to be of consequence makes him, (to an enlightened mind),
appear a childish dunce.
(As an aside you might care to note that this is absolutely, unconditionally true with any comment an ordinary man,
[or would-be mystics], makes that in any fashion whatsoever expresses their displeasure-with & well founded criticism-of —
— anything, (including their own confessed,
sorry state of consciousness.)
The elder held out his cup for a refill from their thermos,
and when the lad had so complied, the father sipped, then spoke.
The manifestation of this that offers you the personal,
is to picture what I have been describing as occurring in your own brain, between an area that is already awake & enlightened,
and the ordinary talking part;
I say that everything the fully conscious section hears
coming from the routine, speaking part of your brain
sounds to it like the babbling of an idiot — the ranting of the deranged,
and this is the basis of me telling you that:
the desire to be awake, enlightened & free in your mind,
is the longing for a — pre verbal I.
If you want the practical use in this picture I am today sketching,
take it as simply as I say it:
your desire to, wake up, (or anything else you want to call it),
is a longing for a — pre verbal I,
for it is only such an I that will not naturally be asleep,
distracted, fragmented & annoying.”
He sipped his coffee again
then looked over at the son & said — nothing,
(he actually said: Huh!? — but without saying it.)