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Notes by DB
This is tape #2606 recorded by Jan Cox November 17, 2000,
00:53 For me …once you are past the point of everyday
survival…the purpose of life is trying to wake up. Becoming enlightened or achieving the great liberation, is to understand the mind. That’s all it is…I don’t know how else you can look at it.
02:40 No one currently understands the mind. No ordinary person, no scientist, no neuroscientist, no expert in the field claims to understand the mind. Run of the mill mystics claim to understand it, but they don’t.
04:17 Why cannot the mind be understood? Even experts with MRI’s, PET’s, EEG’s…and even SUV’s don’t understand the mind. These folks have studied the brain and its functioning in minute detail…down to the single neuron level…yet they don’t understand what the mind is.
05:33 Why can’t the mind be understood? …I was faced with this question. ( I am using the word “I” theatrically…because I don’t exist, and if I did, I have no interest in me. I do not refer to garbage or illusory devices…So….it is a theatrical device. One that does come in handy.)
06:05 I was also struck with this… no operation can understand it’s mechanical operation from observations internal to it’s operations. No system can understand itself from within the system. It just can’t be done.
06:54 At first I tied all this to consciousness. It was my mind trying to understand the mind, and it (my mind) was in the middle of a system and trying to understand the system. And …it seemed to apply to every other aspect of observable life of which human beings can be conscious. No system can understand itself from within the system.
08:02 You cannot take one cell out of a tree and understand the workings of a tree. You cannot take one soldier out of an army and understand the full workings of the army. You cannot take one stockbroker out of the stock exchange and understand the full workings of the market….That alone should strike you as astounding! And that seemed to be true even with consciousness.
08:20 Now.. how do you make all of that fit in with the following fact? A creator is always more conscious than the creation. Or …
a creator can always understand the creation more than vise-a-versa. Say… a man invents an intelligent machine. The machine can never equal the intelligence of the creator.
08:30 This also applies to Art, Literature, Music…whenever there is the creator and the created.
10:50 Now…how does that fit with the following?…Our consciousness is a creation… so to speak. The further you get from the source the less conscious the thing is. The further you get from the source the less understanding of the source there is.
11:16 So I say, the instinctive or non-conscious part of our brain,
the part of our brain that monitors, that keeps us alive, the final arbitrator of our respiration, temperature, equilibrium etc., the part that can keep us alive even when our consciousness is damaged or inoperable….well, consciousness is moving further away from it’s source. Consciousness is the creation of instinctive consciousness,
which can also be considered it’s source.
12:11 Therefore, instinctive consciousness must be more conscious than the consciousness of consciousness. Instinctive consciousness is that which keeps us alive, it is more intelligent, does not seek advice, does not need instructions, does not stumble (unless it is sick), works twenty four hours a day, and unless you are ill it makes no mistakes, it does not need to make discretionary judgments, it comes fully programmed, and you may see it as the source of your life, the source of your survival.
13:00 So…how do you fit that in with the mind…which has apparently come up with ways to aid your survival, such as surgery, where the body is anesthetized, consciousness is put to sleep and .. Say ..your leg is surgically removed.
14:50 Amazing and marvelous accomplishments in medicine, and science …sending men to the moon etc.. But the mind cannot turn around and tell you one thing about itself. How can that be!?
15:00 That kind of thing has helped me more than anything else. More than trying to self remember, more than trying to stop thought. I used everything, and not that everything I tried wasn’t profitable…(but) I look upon this as serious activity…something resembling physical activity. There are no answers here. In case you think I do all of this and come up with a string of answers. I look on this as a kind of serious strenuous physical activity. It’s not a matter of answers.
19:20 After all these years. It all comes down to… waking up is the mind wanting to understand itself. It’s not me doing it…It’s the brain cells. Then it comes down to “How can this be?” And that is my method. It’s “How can this be?” I can’t say that I’m not looking for any answers…but, there are no answers…but something happens. I can’t describe to you what this does to me…but It does something…and I can’t believe it would not happen to you.
21:00 Billions of brain cells are responsible for wondrous accomplishments in science and technology…yet they can’t tell you a thing about themselves. I don’t know about you, but in me
their greatest activity is trying to understand themselves. What gives? How can this be?
21:22 I assume you understand that I don’t just say “what gives?”
and go off somewhere and sit in the corner and gaze at my navel or scratch my head. I know from all my experience that something eventually has got to give.
21:50 Its almost as if you have got to take up part of the neurons battle…except there is no you to take it up.
22:20 How about this…it’s like there is this big open field and there is this one thing out in the middle of it, and that’s what I’m working on.
22:50 Your consciousness cannot affect the instinct of another animal. When a dog has been trained to sit, your consciousness has nothing to do with his behavior. But in us our consciousness can effect our instinct. This doesn’t seem to fit…it doesn’t seem right. And I take this to be very serious and very useful.
26:30 Our conscious mind is spawned by our instinctive mind.
It’s an outgrowth, it’s an outpost, a child, an extension, an elaboration of our older mind …our instinctive mind and brain. Of the two…our consciousness and our instinctive consciousness…instinctive consciousness is the smarter one. Instinct is smarter than the mind that put together rockets and sent men to the moon.
28:00 How then can the creation turn around and affect the creator? Which is what happens because our instinct can be effected! Your thinking mind can read an article that says that by
drinking twenty glasses of water a day you can extend your life span by ten years …and you start to doing that…even though your instinctive mind doesn’t want to do that. Or it can make you get up in the morning when you don’t want to. The conscious mind can save your life…or even kill you. How can that be?
30:40 This is what I have been milking, this is what I have been using for years. How can it be that the conscious mind (the created) turns right around and affects the instinctive consciousness (the creator)?
36:00 There are those out there who are interested in their instinctive mind to the same extent that I am interested in the conscious mind. These people tend to be hypochondriacs…and I don’t mean those who would necessarily fit a psychological profile or definition. But, as I used to try to tell you people, health is not a fit hobby for a man trying to awaken. Like going out jogging and carrying an arm band to measure your blood pressure…or shit like that.
37:00 Health is not a hobby. If you are sick try to stop it. Try to get over it. If you need help get it. But if you are not sick don’t take your temperature or keep looking for trouble…(you are liable to get it).
38:50 There is nothing you can say to a dog to make him start drinking…you can hold him and pour it down him. But there is nothing you can say…no words …no string of words by which your conscious mind can influence the instinct of an animal.
You cannot talk to an animal and convince them in any way
to do anything. You can only do that to another human being …and yourself. How can that be?
40:50 From the brain [stem] on down a Chimp and
a human have damn near the same kind of working instinctive
consciousness…yet human consciousness can turn right around and just through words have an effect on and influence its instinctive consciousness.
43:50 And how can it be that my conscious mind wants to understand itself? How can life be arranged to let.. or to make this happen? None of this fits. Everything fits in life until you get inside the human brain. And everything in the human brain fits until you get inside this one area. It’s the youngest and smallest part of the human brain. Most of the brain is still taken up with instinctive functions. It is busy, busy, busy …keeping you alive.
Then there is this one little part.
45:00 All attempts at waking up involve stopping thoughts or bringing the mind under control. The notion that you can do this will put you solidly to sleep. It is the ultimate “song of the sirens”.
48:30 How can it be that life has set up an arrangement in the brain so that I want to understand what goes on in my mind….and there is no I in there that is seeking this understanding…It was my mind that just said that it wanted to understand mind…not “me”. The saying of that …“I want to understand thoughts”, is like a sirens song.
49:30 I hear this and all of a sudden there is a brief moment of pleasure and then …even knowing that it’s the call of the sirens…
I crash into the rocks…asleep. And I even knew before hand that this was going to happen! What gives with that?
50:01 How can it be that knowing I can’t wake up I am still driven to wake up?
55:19 If a person knowing that they can’t wake up gives up …then to my way of thinking they are either extremely weak …or have the right idea. (Laughs) That was a joke…no it wasn’t…yes it was… wait a minute I forgot which it was. How can that be?
Are you serious? “Yes“. Really? “No” Well which is it? “Now I’m not sure”. How can that be?
I don’t know about you but that’s what I do…plus it’s cheaper than meditating.
Jan’s Posted Daily Fresh Real News
November 17, 2000.
Todays dispatch originates from a place with no name,
(don’t I wish — I mean, don’t you wish —
for if you realized what is really going on
you would want all of these daily reports to come from
a place totally unfamiliar to you — but —
the teenie little problem is that
if they totally did
you would be totally unable to understand them,
(you know, like how you already understand everything else.
Fascinating conundrum, huh?!)
In the real hell there are two separate pits of torment.
One is for ordinary people, who are tortured in the kinds of ways
about like you would imagine,
while the other pit is reserved just for those who spent their lives
trying to wake up,
and permanently alter their state of discretionary consciousness,
and their special torture is to not be able to ever
think about things other than how they have thought about them before.
And one guy bobbing around in the second pit shouts:
Special torture — big deal!
Whats the difference in this
and how my life went any way?!
The unrecognized difficulty inherent in attempts at internal travel
is that every area you see on a maps that interests you
will stick agreeably to your tongue when you lick it;
thus, there you stand with a
sweet taste in your mouth — but! —
there you stand — still — motionless, as in,
To the true explorer — destined-to-succeed,
the more attractive the idea,
the greater the chains it bears.
It takes an extraordinary fortunate adventurer
to ever suddenly realize for himself
the distinction between the map-thoughts in mens minds,
and the unwritten reality going on all around them.
Only thoughts want to, escape from where they are,
and go exploring, and discover The Secret,
and only your thoughts will never succeed,
for the simple reason that
human thoughts made up the whole idea.
Apollonius creates the story of,
Jason & The Quest Of The Golden Fleece,
then after hearing it retold several times,
is so taken by it that he decides to
find Jason and join in the search.
A way of estimating your chances of
succeeding in this undertaking
is whether you thus far find these comments,
(a):discouraging & nihilistic — or,
(b):exhilarating & liberating.
………(Ill give you a hint: the answer is (b).)
Trying to get free when you do not understand what you are doing
is chasing yourself around forever in a
dark, locked room with your eyes closed.
Whee! what fun! some might say.
.a few finally tire of it, and figure out the next step.
(Ill give you a hint: Chase the chaser.)
Every morning you get out of bed with the same body.
You get out of bed with the same survival instincts.
You get out of bed with the same
You get out of bed with the same menu of thoughts.
Hint: Every morning when you get out of bed —
— take the bed with you.
When people with the genes that make them attracted to
this kind of activity
first hear the idea:
Man believes that he is fully conscious
whereas he lives largely in a dream,
but through certain efforts he can awaken,
it instantly strikes them as indisputably true,
and all they then want out of life is to
learn what these certain efforts are.
This is the most exciting, satisfying, and
memorable day of their life.thus far.
They first pursue the efforts attendant the
initial description they read regarding mans
Some never depart same,
while others will try out apparently
but no describable method ever works,
and no describable man ever realizes it.
When Apollonius Jason started the trip,
he stopped at a BP station for a map.
most Apolluniuses never leave the parking lot.
It is not because Jason is stupid,
it is due to the fact that he is an invented figure
in a concocted tale
which Apollonius forgets he concocted.
(Are you getting more pessimistic, or more excited?)
Many people, to the bittersweet end,
will stubbornly cling to their picture of the glass slipper
as opposed to accepting the fact that
Cinderella is fiction.
.harmless fiction, that is.
All fiction is harmless when recognized for what it is.
(More encouraged now?)
If you could think about the things that interest you
in ways other than how you now think about them,
the idea of, waking up would cease to be murky,
but then of course,
if you could think about things in ways other than
you do now — you would be awake.
So, you might ask: What is the problem here?!?
Yeah I know,
but ask it again:
So what is the problem?
why can’t I think about something that interests me
in some manner than how I always think about it?!
I know, I know,
but ask it one more time:
Why is it so seemingly impossible for me to
think about a thing in a way different from how I
usually think about it?!
Why, why, why?!?!
Now listen to yourself,
repeat the question over & over again to yourself
until something totally unexpected clicks;
and when it does —
you will be amazed & delighted.
Amazed at how obvious it is,
and delighted, well.just because you are, dammit.
The type of people naturally attracted to
this sort of activity are always of a quite perceptive
discretionary intelligence, and derive much pleasure from
affairs of the mind;
thus the potential trap is already, (you might say),
self-laid in them in that it is all too easy for them
to be so captivated by the workings of their own,
and perhaps other peoples thinking that they
de facto assume that the kind of
info, and opinions of which thought is the medium
will be the eventual Golden Fleece.
This is predictable and —
The corrective measure needed is to ignore
everything said by your & everyone else’s thoughts;
ignore what is said by thought —
look just at thought.
Look at the medium — not the apparent messages.
There is nothing of any value or help to you
in the messages.
Not realizing this is what stalls out almost everyone’s little car
hardly before the little adventure has gotten under way good.
Dont keep mulling over questions and problems that bother you
using the words & descriptions you have always used.
No matter how proper & correct they seem,
they are useless —
— they are worse than useless
since clinging to them blinds you to
other ways of looking at the questions
which would temporarily provide improved insight.
If what you think about things had any potential for waking you up
would it not by now have done so?!
(Well? — more discouraged — or
is it beginning to dawn on you?!)
If in life something could actually, be a shame
this is it;
for a person born with an affinity for undertaking to
re-create themselves in their
to give up — to give in
before tis necessary.
Forget about studying some method —
any method — to, achieve Enlightenment,
and study instead this question:
What is it going on inside of my brain
that is behind my wanting to study
some method to achieve Enlightenment?
This may not at first blush sound as exotic as
meditating in the cold on a far away mountain top,
while chanting a magical word given to you by
an Enlightened Master
after you gave him all of your belongings,
(and signed a blank, promissory note),
but it is more of, all that
than any of all that other stuff can ever be —
— if what you really want is to
see this thing through to a most glorious surprise.
Quit whining about not being able to find the,
right system, teaching, ideas that will, wake you up;
only by your investigating & understanding what
waking up IS
will it come to pass.
In otter woirds:
If you really — truly — want to wake up,
do not listen to anything that anyone has to say —
— except me,
and what I say is:
Do not listen to anything that anyone has to say —
— including you —
See how easy it is.
Did everyone grasp that in my rendition of the myth,
Apollonius is not a person, and Jason & The Fleece his thoughts,
but rather, Apollonius, the thoughts,
and the adventures of Jason
their somnambulistic distraction.
To “be awake” is to know what is to be done,
but not be able to do it.
To be really awake is to know what is to be done, and
understand that it can’t be done.
Okay, final word for the day:
To “be asleep” is to
stand for your thoughts beating you in the head with
their version of how things are.
Well, one more thing; The Weekly Reminder:
You should not take anything said in these writings, literally.
…………….unless you want to..