Hormones Can’t Speak, But Never Lie
Summary = See below
Condensed News Items = See below
News Item Gallery = jcap 94035 -1276
Transcript = None
Key Words =
#1276 – 04/29:
Notes by TK
What the ordinary mind cannot ever say: “I don’t know” rather than interminable explication. Hormones cannot speak, but never lie. Neurons attempt to interpret and explain but get confused.
Trying to think in an unaccustomed manner can muck up most
people’s thinking — and most people don’t like to have their
“thinking mucked up”!
Criticism: The fleas on the backs of complaints, which are
the ticks on the backs of opinions, which are the lice on the
backs of comments — and so on — up, and down, and, sideways,
all along the food chain line.
A new definition: To be truly civilized is to be able to
raise civilized hell. And neurons demanded of hormones: “Did
you get that!?” And hormones responded: “No! Did you get
that!?” And neurons replied: “Oh no! Did YOU!?” And hormones
…(etc. & so on).
One guy’s view: “If, with ordinary people, there IS such a
thing as actual, ‘individuality’, then it’s just life’s idea of a
little joke!” The guy says he thought of this some time ago, and
that the more he thinks about it, the more even he understands
what it means.
Multiple Choice Definitions
Mystics: The religious with brains.
Mystics: Bus passengers who’re eventually gonna insist on
Mystics: Those never satisfied, but content with being so
— hell, delighted!
….. Truth-In-Reporting Version For City Minds
Mystics: Those, (should they speak more about it), who
would be royal pains in the butt to the rest of us!
The mind to consciousness is not totally unlike a cat
tossing out bird seed.
…..One man had a saying: “Comparisons suck!” But based on
what’s possible — what’re’ya gonna do!?”
…..Sometimes when he was asleep — (and no one would know
about it) — this one man would lapse into little temporary
comas; he later started doing it in the day time also.
Two brothers graduated from school at the same time with
degrees in Sociology, and Psychology, and after experiencing
quite limited success the first brother changed the name of his
practice to: Civil Engineering. And after some thought, the
second brother changed the name of his to: The Repair Of Small
Examples prove nothing. In man’s civilized world everything
is proven by example.
One proof of a warrior’s inner strength is that he has the
power to desalinate his own mental seas.
…..Oh yeah — and from our “Consumer Hotline,” this note:
Regardless of what you may have heard — routine thinking is more
than “eighteen calories”!
There is nothing more important in life than hormones. Do
not however, seek verification for this from neurons.
To some, the idea of the “mystical liberation” entails not
only the explosive awakening of the mind, but also the death of
the body. Don’t you think that may be overdoing it a bit!?
Personal anecdotes are not history. The history of most men
is in personal anecdotes.
As a young snake attempted to swallow some lively, new
ideas, its mother cautioned: “Don’t try and take in things that
are too large in the middle, for they can get caught in your
middle.” Now for your edification — it’s precisely stuff like
this that keeps reptiles & other small creatures from ever
reaching the lofty status of man! …(Mentally speaking.)
The Literary Relationship Between Man’s Mind & Emotions
A well-written page is a happy page — unless it concerns
…..(Anyone who doesn’t “get” this one may wait until an item
comes around regarding the body, and sloppy penmanship.)
On wet, slow days, there’s always this approach available:
Ordinary people are not stupid who, profess to believe in gods,
and supernatural possibilities; the truly stupid are those who
criticize those who do.
The ever-present danger for the would-be mystic is that
he become too serious.
You can resist the mechanical because it is painful, or
because it is unprofitable; the collective are more inclined
toward the first, an alert individual, to the latter; what is the
actual difference between the two approaches? Very little.
…..It takes a lot to move the collective — but just a little
for the individual. But — it takes a lot of the little.
“D.S.W.O.L.A.I.” – D’are Several Ways Of Looking At It
Life is able to draft everyone into service and keep them
there without pay by making them take it all seriously. Or:
Life is able to draft everyone into service and keep them there
without pay by making them believe that they volunteered. Or:
Life is able to draft everyone into service and keep them there
without pay by allowing them complete freedom to complain. Or:
Life is able to draft everyone into service and keep them there
without pay due to the fact that it DOES actually pay them.
Resistance will do you no good if you don’t know what to
resist. In the intellectual world, all resistance is infantile
Ordinary, civilized people are too busy to fool with
stuff like this. …That’s just the way it is.
…..The ever-present danger for the would-be mystic is that he
become too serious.
Those incurably addicted to bus stations are often those
who most loudly denounce them.
…..”Say Daddy — how do you explain that?” “Hell son — how
do you explain anything!?”
…..All aboard! Now loading-the-loaded, at Gate Nine.
…..After examining him, the patient told the doctor: “Look,
if the worst thing that’s ever gonna happen to you is that you’re
gonna die, you might as well go ahead and get it over with now.”
And now: This Public Service Announcement
Friends don’t advise friends, drunk! Fact: Anyone who
advises anyone else — is drunk!
Many, who cannot understand their own voice, undertake to
believe that it is in fact, god’s voice that they hear.
…..Anyone who still doesn’t recognize that — “Everything’s
gonna work out fine” just ain’t from this universe!
…..”Attention, snoopers! Now on Aisle Seven, you may trade in
rats-for-roaches, but not, tears-for-stupidity.”
…..Through “mail-order-medical-training” you can learn to
treat yourself for all manner of ills! Save two.
Uncivilized hormones could hardly make it in the city;
neurons sans survival training in the wilds — absolutely not.
One man thought: “If I could have as much fun playing
with my mind as I do my dick — then I too might become a
mystic!” …(There was also a woman who held a similar sentiment,
but was too polite to put it in such terms.)
…..The drum major announced: “Would all of the really dumb
please move to the back of the parade.” And pretty soon, (just
as was intended):
The rear of the procession
Was also now its head,
And all that need be done,
Was all that need be said.
And man — “That Civilized Wonder Of All Marches” — was off!!
A man with no talent may become king, but a king with no
talent never “becomes” man.
…..”That’s an awfully attractive dress you’re wearing.”
“That’s no dress — that’s me! (And for your information — it’s
not nearly as awful as it could be!)”
…..Where the taste of the collective prevails, fashion will
pass for intelligence.
Man is the only creature who will defend his non-material
territory as vigorously as will a beast its physical one.
…..The above Public Service Announcement was brought to you
through a grant from: “Reputations ‘R Us,” …(and, god help us)
“Us ‘R Them.”
…..For all his assistance, one man said to life: “Where’s my
tip?” And life replied: “Loose some weight.”
The only protection needed by a neural knight is to be
bulletproof to himself …or maybe that’s, TO himself (!?) Well,
no matter, it’s one or the other.
…..Ordinary thinking turned to the mind and said: “Boy! Now
who’s gonna get us outta this!?” And the mind replied: “Well
who the hell got us into it!?” And routine thought replied:
“Hey, don’t confuse me!”
Gossip: The telling of personal anecdotes about others
in hopes that someone will eventually tell some about you.
…..As he sat idly gazing through the dictionary a man was
suddenly struck: “No wonder I keep thinking the same shit over
and over again!”
Another possible difference between the religious and the
mystic is that the former would be greatly disturbed to discover
humor at the base of their area of interest, while a mystic would
A selection from: “A Child’s Garden Of Hair”
It’s sad to be dumb,
And dumb to be sad,
Things may be worse, but — hey!
They could be bad.
…..In certain fairy tales, certain characters mistake what’s
on their head for what’s in their head, but, — “No harm done!”
After all, they’re just fairy tales.
…..Hippos think pigs look stupid! Being so “fat-and-all,” —
and yet so small.
…..The captain asked the ship’s artist: “Is it all simply a
matter of perspective?” And “he-who-must-sketch” replied: “Yes,
except at such times as your own vessel is bearing on the reefs.”
All the people in the yellow coats want all the people in
the red coats to come over and join their team, and all the
people in the red coats experience some hesitation. The latest
scores are: The City, 10 — The Wilds, 2; Hormones, 5 —
Neurons, a disputed 3.7. Be sure and tune in next week when next
week will be now, and now will be the week after that.
The uncivilized make great bowling partners. Hell, the
uncivilized make great bowling balls.
To fulfill its normal duties, each man’s mind must feel
itself separate from all others; the “liberating experience” is
what frees consciousness from this restraint.
To “some” extent, everybody knows what they’re doing.
…But not to such an extent to be of any consequence.
The primary attraction in telling anecdotes about
yourself is in the certainty of the appearance of the word “I.”
No one can look better than their parents, but everyone
can be stupider. Note: The above may, or may not be possible
and correct, but so what! Who cares! And like that! Right!?
…Hey! Would all you dumb, ugly people in the back pay a
little more attention to what we’re doing up here!?!
From a higher, metaphysical view: Human behavior is —
rat droppings, and human thought — the rat, and humans, the
house it all takes place in. This was a test! And if you took
and passed or failed it — this was a test.
…..After he was born, life told one man: “Go ahead and pick
out your own name — pick any one you want — it doesn’t matter
’cause I’m gonna get you any — This was a test!”
Whenever he was confronted with metagnostic ideas this
one man would grab his mental crotch and say: “Anything that
makes you horny can’t be all bad.”
…..One man only needed glasses to read dumb, ordinary ideas.
If you’re ordinary — being serious helps keep you alive;
if you’re not — it helps kill you.
Conversation Regarding Aquatic Mental Exercise
First guy says: “To get going, you need a diving board.”
And second guy says: “Yeah, but you also need a pool to swim
in.” And first guy replies: “Hey! What d’ya want from the mind
Terminal Definitions, (That is, Definitions Of Certain
Terms): Thinking About The Mystical: Something to think about
before you’re a mystic.
“Imaginary” freedom is itself a form of captivity.
How Everything Can Be More Than Just One Thing
A man asked his dog: “Are you about ready to e-a-t?”
And the dog thought: “Spell?”
Children’s play song from one land:
“We have a motor in our head,
A motor in our gut,
One runs just right,
The other should shut up.”
Why Homo Sapiens Are Great, Great Actors
Anyone can cry when they’re sad!
After hearing him speak, one man told a mystic: “You’re
nutty as a loon.” And the weird one quickly corrected the man:
“I believe you mean, ‘lutty as a noon.'” And the man replied:
“Yeah — that’s what I meant.”
From a more conscious view,
The mind’s first mistake,
Was believing four,
Is made of two and two.
A serious man is a dead man who just hasn’t laid down
yet. Or: A dead man is a serious man who can now say, “See! I
Freedom is freedom! No matter what it’s called, or how
Fake Mystical Groups: Real reasons for fake mystics to
After surveying the task before him, the carpenter turned
to his cache of implements and thought: “As always, the knack
is, ‘the right tool for the right job.'” And his mind suddenly
jerked-to and said: “Are you speaking to me?” And a small hand
planer replied: “Mind your own business!”
…..A “tv personality” who DOESN’T talk to himself HAS no
Hormones can do things that for years to come will make
neurons say: “What the hell d’you do that for!?”
“Life” has only one true synonym — Growth. (Anything
else is convenient illusion.)
As regards the “mystical practises,” (for example,
“mindfulness,” & “self-remembering”), those who can be mindfull,
and can, self-remember, know that there are no such things as,
mindfulness, and self-remembering.
Hormonal-Neural Tales You Never Find
In Routine Fairy Books
If you know just how to do it, you can kiss yourself in a
“certain place,” and turn back & forth from a frog-to-a-prince,
and from a prince-to-a-frog, whenever you want.
Death: The supreme attempt at “self-improvement.”
One guy’s mind looked at the thing that was in there with
it and said: “Who the hell are you?” And it replied: “What are
you doing here?” And his mind said: “I’m the mind.” And the
thing replied: “No you’re not — I am.” And the mind said:
“Really? Are you sure?” And it nodded, yes.
Each morning, when he would roll out of bed, one man
would jump up and down several times on the exact spot where his
feet first touched the floor, and exclaim: “This is it! Here
and now! Here — right here is the mystical.”
One day one guy’s mind looked at the thing that was in
there with it and said:
“Who the hell are you?”
And the thing replied: “I’m the mind.”
And the man’s mind said: “No you’re not I am.”
And the thing replied: “Wrong! I am.”
And the mind said: “Are you sure?”
And it nodded in the affirmative.
Liberation produces two things distinct: More
liberation, and more hunger for liberation.
…..At the cosmic level: ‘Tis a poor snake that cannot feed
its own connecting end.
As he passed through a village a knight was stopped by a
blind man, a poor man, and a cripple, who each asked him: “Had
you begun as I am, would you be the warrior that you are today?”
And as he rode away, he thought to himself: “Hell! Starting off
as I was, I just barely made it.”
Health — Update, Backdate, and Hot Date
All man’s “mental problems” are actually, problems-of-
After knocking on his door, and then answering it, a man
introduced himself, then announced: “Not only do I have a
‘combination offer’ to present to myself, but I am a combination
A Money Saving Tip To Save You From Attending Seances
We all talk to our ancestors.
There was once a neural warrior who called himself, The
Dichotomy Butcher. …(Full name: The Ceaseless Slayer Of
Captivity: A Poem
My mind is a bus station,
And my thoughts, the only bus running.
Everyone has two sets of eyes; most don’t know this, a
few know even more.
With pen and paper one man began to keep a detailed
record of everything he thought. Looking at it later put him
back to sleep all over again.
…..To defend its normal operations, the mind can say — “It
could always be worse.” But you will never know if this is true
or not as long as you are hemmed in by what the mind normally
thinks and says.
…..Riding a bus is not really the problem, (cause you can
always complain about it), the trick is in actually tearing
yourself away from the bus station that seems so “natural” to
An authentic knight must eventually become king, a true
individual must finally leave the herd, two minds must mutually
self-consume, and a real person be left with only themself.
To himself, one man noted: “I don’t worry about it the
way I used to.” With no need to be more specific — he knew
exactly what he meant!
How Progress Works
The speakers in one man’s wheels got so large that he put
in a car behind their rear seat.
…..Many people don’t care much for progress — since it
doesn’t always come labeled as such.
….. Progress: A Poem
Progress is as progress does,
If you don’t watch it,
Progress’ll run right over your dick.
…..Many people don’t care all that much for progress; a lot
The most dangerous form of seriousness is to take other
people seriously — either that, or to believe that they are
serious in what they say.
A neural warrior’s resurrection comes solely from within
— …or so it appears.
On those extraordinary days when he was closer to the
reality, one man secretly wanted to look around and ask: “Who do
I have to thank for this?”
Life is more fun when you’re alive.