Summary = TBD
Condensed News Items = See below
News Item Gallery = jcap 93119 -1199
Transcript = None
Key Words =
The News
Life — buoyed by its initial success — man, decided to
write a sequel: “Man The Collective.”
…..Although not commonly known, life has a prize for anyone
who can make it laugh.
…..”You see, son, the humor inherent in the offer is in the
words ‘commonly known’.” …And they both had a hearty chuckle.
***
On good days, one man would sometimes think: “Simply ‘being
alive’ is like a hot fudge sundae, and being alive and conscious
is like also having whipped cream and a cherry on top.” Sad to
say, but few days were like this for the man, and even those that
were — he didn’t entirely trust.
…..”Ooooh,” cooed a pistachio merchant, “what if we could have
like: simply ‘being conscious’ is the ‘big-deal’ and being
conscious while still alive, made it even better!?” “Oooh!,” he
shivered.
***
Tryin’ To “Get Somewhere — Extraordinare”
Ask yourself: What would you give to get where you want to
go?!?
…..Casual Observation
Only the non-traveling, old “stay-at-homers” believe this
applies to just behavior.
***
“Physi, And Other ‘Ologies’: Or: Look At The Chart Boy!,
Look At The Chart!”
You have juice in your stomach, juice in your sex, juice in
your bowels and brains, so, okay boy — which’ll it be!?
…..”Yes, you in the back!?”, said a man looking at the
classroom of his own mind, “Why are you still in the back?!”
***
One man’s recent scan: “Being civilized might not be so bad
if they didn’t make us take it so seriously.”
…..Restrictions on possibilities is always a grave affair.
…..”Daddy, could we put it like this: ‘Restrictions on
possibilities is always a matter of gravity’!?” “Yes, my boy, so
long as you’re using that certain, proper definition of the word
‘gravity’.” “Ah-h-h, what-ho!, dad — truly, what-ho!”
…..If history lives long enough, some outlaws are eventually
taken to be mystics. What-ho!
***
Update For Ken & Barbie,
(And All Of Their Kin And Kind).
We could say that there are two possible pursuits of
happiness; the old fashioned “hormonal” one, and then “some other
sort.” …(According to certain reports, there are those who
will still chase the former variety at their own, otherwise
expense.)
***
One fellow’s explanation of things: “If ‘urine’ didn’t
rhyme with ‘untrue’ we wouldn’t be in the sorry state we are
today!”
***
More Truisms Refurbished And Updated
The dumb die but once — but they do that one over, and
over, and over, and…
…..”Just think,” noted a farmer to his son, “those who get-
mad-at, and make-fun-of cows, are relieved of any possible
additional responsibilities.”
…..Cosmological Historical Revision
There were four original forces that created this universe,
but one of them dropped out.
***
Those who don’t know what’s going on don’t like to hear
what’s going on.
…..Turnabout Quiz
How many more conscious men would it take to make one,
ordinary dumb one?
…..”My boy,” said a carousel operator to his son, “did you
know that we originally had a Ferris wheel!?”
***
Since man — (the “homo sapien”) — does not literally
require the presence of a mind to physically survive, this
function cannot be fed and satisfied as simply as his other
hungers; no, it is indeed unique in that it must be entertained,
if it is to be enriched and nourished. The ordinary have
civilization as their attempt — what has a more enthusiastic
person!?
…..If, “info is its own reward” then what should we expect
from more “spirited data”!?
***
The man brought before the king chuckled and said: “You can
certainly kill me, but after I’m dead you’ll still be dumb.” And
the ruler turned to an aide and asked: “Is that true?”
***
A man who thinks about “thinking-things” is no longer
confined — full time — to an out-dated brain.
…..Cats need mull over matters feline, and rats on those more
rodent; but man has nothing so native to weigh, and thus has some
slack, not physically known.
…..Architect’s Lament
We are provided a penthouse, but made worry over basement
affairs.
…..Appraiser’s Reply
Any song sung can be sung in reverse. — (Think about it.)
***
A four pound lump, in a suit and tie, and apparently
weighing one eighty-five, called his family together before him,
and told ’em: “Whilst being alive here on this planet, it has
come finally to my attention that men too dearly love to talk
about: aging, sickness and death — so let’s get it right out in
the open here, and be done with it.” He then assumed the stance
of a choir director, and led them all in singing as loudly as
possible:
“Aging, sickness and death! —
Aging, sickness and death! —
Aging, sickness and death! —
Aging, sickness and death! —
Aging, sickness and death! —
Aging, sickness and death!” —
And so on, until they too were sick of hearing about it.
…..Hey, what say!? — Let’s hear it for the lump!
***
Rainy Day Fun: How To Be Dumber
Than You Ever Imagined Possible
Criticize the ordinary.
…..A viewer asks: “Can you talk faster!?”
***
A man writes us to say: “I never hear you say anything
serious about, politics, finances, religion, mama, or trying to
improve your bad habits.”
***
Being human is the only journey in which the traveler knows
that he’s going somewhere, but doesn’t know where it is.
Alternate Version
Being human is the only journey in which the traveler knows
where he’s going, yet doesn’t know that he’s going somewhere.
…..Which one you like best?
***
A Human Interest Item From Another Universe
One man waited ’til well past his middle years to ever put
his best foot forward; — explaining that before that, he didn’t
have a best foot.
…..Even the ordinary can laugh at things they don’t believe
exist.
…..The Post Office’s Tracking Of One More Conscious Man
First he was here! — Then he was there! — Then he was
some place else.
…..A lad standing on the corner, cocked his ear again and
thought; there’s a certain way, the truth, to me, sounds just
like a song.
***
And back under the mighty “M’s” we find this definition:
Man: The only part of creation that in part, creates itself.
…..History (In Part)
Man was put here so that this planet might have symbolism,
and thus a form of reality that is in fact, more that it is (in
fact).
…..Sidebar
On lesser developed worlds, they’re only up to the level of
metaphors. …Where are you up to!? — oh great, literate-
minded-one!?
***
Civilization,
Or:
A’Hunting They Just Went
As arrows hurt eagles, so too words, man.
…..”But daddy — is this the way it’s supposed to be?” “Where
in the world did you pick up such an unseemly concept as
‘supposed to be’!?”
***
Men must ordinarily exaggerate what they say since it means
so little to begin with.
***
A more conscious man was the original model and inspiration
for the term, “pig-headed” — but without the pig head.
***
Important, Humorous One-Liner From The Orb Closet To Venus
Everyone “really” enjoys being told what to do in life! —
especially, not so, a more alert man!
…..”That’s okay son, don’t worry about it — it’s my opinion
that if we were on a planet with a lot less oxygen, ideas like
that one might then make some kind of sense.”
…..Familial Responsibilities Reexamined
An earth-based parent who will assure his off-spring as to
the validity of collective thinking and reality, has committed a
homicide without a visible weapon.
…..And now: Some Humor And Enlightenment (In Some
Combination) From The Wild World Of Musical Show Biz: One guy
said to his mind: “Hey, if you ever get that thing in tune —
weld it!”
***
Definition
Being ordinary: A temporary “time-out” from being what you
ought to be. …(Well, it should be temporary!)
***
Right from the start! — as soon as man’s brain became
conscious and he began to think, he suspected what was going on.
…..Civilization, Family, Prestige, & Position: All things to
help you dis-remember.
…..Not too long ago, a man thought: “Why do I not find it
routinely curious that while it is my mind that brags and boasts,
it is in fact only my physical parts that ever achieve anything
resembling success, yet they never have anything to say!?”
…..(Okay, have you fully dis-remembered yet!?)
***
The collective intelligence of man is a herd, the herd is
the combined understanding of man; you may have a ticket,
Sundance, but that still doesn’t mean that a train’ll actually
stop in a dinkwater town like this.
…..Space Travel: A metaphorical concept for the desire to
leave the planet.
***
The Structure
No effort without thinking, but just thinking is no effort.
***
On this one world, the riding of neural bicycles requires
that you be able to maintain a balance between being “privately
rude” while appearing publicly not to be so.
…..Back on this one planet, the figure in the isolated stall
looked first at his soap — then at his weapons in hand — and
mused: “A misplaced comma has been the death of many a wary
man.”
***
Sociology In A Test Tube
One man alone cannot be a society, but if he gets mad enough
he’ll attract others, and then they can be.
…..While watching a wild-life special on tv one afternoon,
this one man’s stomach reflected: “If man treated his mind the
way leopards threat gazelles…” and suddenly the man interrupted,
saying: “‘If’!? — what the hell do you mean ‘if’!?”
…..City Intellectual Man: Spinal fluid in a test tube in a
suit and tie.
…..Squirrels are like nature’s way of trying to make rats
forget where they came from.
…..”‘If!?’ — What the hell do you mean ‘if’!?”
***
Dual Histories Of One Guy
He first thought: “Boy!, if my mind could have as much fun
as my body, I’d be a riot!” Then later thought: “Boy!, if my
body could have as much fun as my mind, I couldn’t stand it!”
(He’s working on the third stage.)
***
General Locale: Planet Earth — Specifics: How To
Determine Your Exact Position
Out of all the alive, alert and moving creatures here, why
is it man alone who loves to hear himself talked about?
…..Unrelated Inquiry
What if it is actually the dumb who really understand what’s
going on, and the clever who do not!?
…..”Ahhh, come on now!”, says one man, “don’t bring up stuff
like that! — Just talk about me and make me feel good.”
***
One guy’s grouch: “The collective ain’t crap! — And most
of the individuals I know just barely are!”
***
When ordinary people ponder the possibility of anything
extraordinary occurring in life, they think of such as being
either of a physical nature, or of a non physical one; someone
who has some suspicion of what the hell’s going on around here
thinks of it better than that.
***
Romantic Update
Or:
A’Hunting They Still Go
If eagle couples could talk, would they say: “I love you!?”
— Would worms? — And which of the two would be the more likely?
— And, why?
***
One man says: “To me, ordinary thinking is no more than
just ‘one thing after another’.” Then asks: “Is there any more
than that?”
***
One man thought: “Any philosophy, religion, or other mental
model, that causes some men to feel they’ve been harmed, either
emotionally or intellectually, seems to me to have missed-the-
point.”
…..To be just minimally conscious is to conceive of the mind
as a weapon, aimed at certain problems and questions, and, never
hitting same — thus seems lamentable. The trick is not in
finding new targets, or improved ballistics, but in raising your
sights.
…..Only toads, not elephants, react to B.B. shots by crying:
“Ohh!, I’ve been hit!” Furthermore: Only frogs shoot at other
frogs.
…..The trick is in raising your sights.
***
Those who condemn the acts of their childhood are even worse
than children.
***
As he would push off from the dock each morning, one man
would cry out: “Electro-chemicals — aweigh!”
***
Some civilizations keep coming up with approaches similar to
this: “Take drugs — get edgy — jump up and down and yell! —
and like that.”
***
The collective need one another, a more conscious man needs
everything he can get his hands on.
***
And Now Our: “Fairly Grim Tale For The Day”
(Subtitled: “Oh Brother!”)
On this one world, was this one man who once thought:
“Since no one wants to hear about the hormone-neuron connection,
or about the relationship between the cats and the birds, or
about the ties ‘twix man’s mind and his physique, and the
dependence of the present on the past…hummmm — maybe I’ll just
tell all the merry go rounds that they used to be Ferris wheels.”
***
Earth-Driven Epic: In One Sentence Or Less
Men know what they are — minds don’t.
***
The collective has always told would-be mystics, and those
with other unusual travel interests, that they are deranged; this
approach both works and doesn’t work, just like any good rational
approach is supposed to work.
…..After many years of standing on the station platform with
his neighbors, one man looked away and thought: “Since it’s
becoming obvious to me that no train is ever going to arrive
here, and even those that apparently do, never actually go
anywhere, what’s to stop me mentally from terrorizing and
kissing-off the whole affair!?”
…..Travel Advisory If they ever get your name into the dictionary — you’re
done for!
***
Yet Another Reason You Shouldn’t Stand Too Close To The
Bulletin Boards In The Post Office
There is a certain mental “lawlessness” about those doing
this.
…..In one state, for forty-eight cents, you can send yourself
out of town.
…..A Safety Feature: The dumb’ll never catch you at it; oh,
they can get hostile and suspicious of you, but they never
understand why.
…..Trying To Privately Be “More Conscious”: Mysticism with
the martyrdom removed.
***
A boy on the midway, whose father used to “Guess Your Wait”
and the extent of your patience, sat on a box and thought: “What
if the few actually working to be more conscious is just life’s
way of keeping everyone else from even trying?”
…..”Alert” From The Emergency Broadcast Network
All “published reports” are now inoperable. (Side Note:
They always have been.) Now, back to your life — I mean, the
show.
***
In a supreme act of desperation & exhilaration, one man
hurled a home-made hand grenade into the very bowels — nay, heart
— of a dictionary, and was done with it!
***