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The News
930790- 1
We begin with combined reports from both our meteorological and Sports Desks:
It has just been confirmed —
Yes! — we are part OF the weather! -And, Si! — the scores always INCLUDE us!
93079- 2
As a favor —
One city offered a man his choice of either having big muscles, or a big mind,
And the man said: “You call that a favor!?”
Definition:
Civilization: The increasing sensation that you HAVE no “choice.”
NOW do you see!? — that there’s a good reason Indexes come
at the end of a book,
And death at the same of life!?
93079- 3
When you can be mentally original — life becomes a drug — an “upper,”
While most of collective entertainment becomes a drag — a “downer.”
In secret — (and certainly listed in no book) —
Might be the fact that to a real thinker
The worst insult possible would be to conceive of something as, “boring.”
…(Of course some of you may have already figured out that the
Unstated, though actual purpose of collective-styled entertainment is to
Minimize one’s intellectual activity.)
93079- 4
A Neural Musical Notation Based on Stringed Instrument Considerations:
Compared to the “open tuning,” Flamenco style of an original thinker,
The play of the ordinary employs a capo.
Even when the tone-deaf are confronted by Bach’s B Minor Mass,
They’ll still say: “I don’t get it!”
93079- 5
Our Vocabulary Editor left this item regarding definitions:
Surprise, Irony, Unbelievable, & Paradoxical: Synonyms for “ignorance.”
93079- 6
In realities not limited to three-dimensional local conditions & binary laws of dynamics,
A mental tailor, for example,
Can employ gem clips in place of stitches.
A simple suit is a happy suit,
When worn to the Crude-Layer’s Ball.
93079- 7
Let’s Be Fair About It:
To be “ordinary” is to understandably want to be ” fashionable”! — to, “fit in”–dammit, & by god!
93079—8
Sissies will always take the sissy way out.
93079—9
Tonight, instead of our regular, “Homeowner’s Roofing Tip” we offer up this item of interest:
To save you some valuable time in the city —
Don’t waste yours by always feeling like you have to look around at certain things,
For instance: Don’t Waste Your Time Looking: A man who says he’s special. –ain’t.
Tar ’til done.
9307 10
Our in-house, “Professor of Professor-Type Matters” gives up this news item:
The really great and neat thing about “ignorance” is that it doesn’t really exist!
9307-11
City experts are seldom original.
93079-12
Info, relayed from one father to a child:
“The simplistic run the world — and life runs them.”
93079-13
I guess the biggest chunk of irony — (if you insist on hearing about such) –
Is the fact that in spite of what man so passionately believes–
There IS no such thing as, “irony.”
* Hoop de doop de, Leon!
93079-14
Several former neighborhood choir boys
Have formed a neo-neural, doo-wop group,
And have recorded a demo tape of a revised version of a hit song from last year
That they plan to enter in the church’s annual “Song Festival”;
It is entitled:
“A man with nothing particular to do is usually pleased to do it on you,”
…(The Holy Fathers and Mothers don’t seem all that enthralled over the whole affair.)
93079 15
A Visit with Writer’s Cramp — Out at The Literary Camp:
While neurons are the pens and word processers of all authors,
With city ones — only hormones constitute their ink and electricity.
93079-16
An expert who makes predictions in his field is no expert.
93079-17
A merry go round not going anywhere is a happy merry go round —
…Well, at least, satisfied —
Well… if it’s not actually going anywhere at least the little painted horsies
Won’t have occasion to get all upset and suffer from motion sickness.
A man standing near the cotton candy booth stops to wonder if
There is any operational connection between routine simplicity, and, fear?
93079-18
Some GOOD City News for A Change:
If your name begins with, “B,” you don’t HAVE to be in a rush.
93079 18 (b)
And a viewer writes in with this question:
“Why are all tv anchor people seated while they read the news?”
Because their feet are nailed to the floor sir — that’s why!
93079-19
This item from a “More Complex, Better-Humored View”
There are two kinds of “News”: The kind that sucks — and the kind that’s boring.
Oh, all right Professor — give us another one of your “special” definitions:
The News: History not yet with its fully-realized death pallor.
And a viewer inquires: “Why do you run a’news..show when you so often attack the very idea?!”
For the same reason that a knowing-priest would daily explode the church,
And a thoughtful king would continually commit suicide.
And a thinker thought: A dead city is indeed a happy city — if it’s the one to which I’VE been assigned.
93079-20
It’s hard to be considered an “Entertainer” if what you do doesn’t encourage stupor.
93079-21
It’s hormones that get the blues — then neurons who talk about it.
Hey! — how’s about you neurons just ‘shuttin’ up’!?”
“Hey man! — what’d you want from us!? — we’re just tryin’ to run a brain.”
Viewer’s Tip: Sissies like to hear it called “the mind” — rather than “the brain.”
93079-22
City experts are expert at one thing — “intellectual lip syncing.”
93079 -23
Put it to you plain & direct: The simplistic have to shill for somebody.
93079 -24
Another example of what city minds would just LOVE-E-E to call a, “Paradox”:
While the real desire of the “religious” is to be original. –
In their being what-they-are — they can NEVER be so.
This song was originally published under the title of:
“A ‘Thinker-With-A-Program’ AIN’T NO Thinker! — (Thank You!)”
93079-25
Cows weigh more in a crowd.
93079-26
Some Literary News — (I suppews):
If you try to encourage others to “think,”
And use your own life as an example —
You’re just a step away from writing fiction.
93079-21
Now for some, Game Show News:
“Hostility,” and “Originality” are not a match.
93079-28
As a useful, sincere joke,
The inner king of this one neural land would daily proclaim: “Shoot the poor.”
Note: Useful sincere city people can’t do this — much less, understand it.
93079-29
Another aspect of, “The Herd’s Mental Morality”:
When, “stuck-for-an-answer”– step on the other person’s foot.
93079-30
Another positive aspect of original thinking is that it never harms or offends anyone –
Oh, it can momentarily put a surprised cow off her feed — but, no lasting damage.
93079-31
A Story from The City:
One man wanted to be a writer, but he apparently had no talent —
So, he sat for a bit and pondered the matter —
Then decided: “Okay, I’ll write about sex and hormonal stuff like that — AND,
I’ll write about the writings of other people.” —
And he became famous, and like that.
93079-32
Now a story from our Anthropology Desk:
At times when the “city-civilized” are confronted with their own paucity of original thought,
Many will reach for a basketball — some for a Bible,
While others just wish they’d cut you when you first came ’round the corner.
The collective IS on a never-ending March of Progress,
But nobody wants you goosin’ up the tempo of, “Stars and Stripes Forever.”
— (And it’s not a nefarious plot —
And it’s not because people are unusually dense;
It’s just that life & local conditions have established a stable marching pace,
And no one can conceive of any reasonable need to change it — much less increase it.
93079-33
Some news from the, “Jokester’s Corner”:
Those who believe-that they’ve, ‘Put one over on life’
Have just sat on the world’s largest Whoopie Cushion.
93079-34
Now it’s time again for a feature from our, “Thinker’s View”:
The difference between a man’s body and his mind is that there is none.
…(I warned you this would be from a thinker’s view!)
93079-35
Some City Show Business News:
The crude are entertained chemically — the sophisticated, electronically.
…and — Oh yeah! — thinkers entertain themselves.
93079-36
A Lad’s Adventurous Verse: Concerning (Perhaps) That Great Metaphysical Quest:
I was out on a spree,
When I had to pee,
So, I asked local conditions if it would
Stop over by those woods
— It did — And,
When I got out,
And looked all about,
I discovered the whole scene was just me.
93079-37
No matter by what name it may be called,
The basic,
The continuing,
The supreme urge of all men is toward originality.
93079-38
Academia Time! — Academia Time:
Without neurons — there IS no “written History” —Without hormones — there is nothing to write about.
Definition Time! — Definition Time:
A Real Thinker: An individual exception to the above.
93079-39
And now, a feature concerning, “Memory”:
The crude remember hormones — thinkers do better.
93079-40
This fax just came in to the station from an apparently upset member of our viewing audience:
“Sirs and Madams — (or, Madams and Sirs,
Whichever is the damn current politically correct version):
If rational ‘sequence’ doesn’t have anything to do with it,
Then explain to me how Mendelssohn happened to come back as Mozart!?”
93079-41
The concept of “opposition” came about so that the simplistic could have a substitute for “originality.”
93079-42
A Survival Tip For Viewers Who Might Feel A Mite “Shaky.”
Hormones don’t COMMIT “suicide.”
And now: A Combination: “Flyer’s & Verbal-Buyer’s” Feature:
Would you prefer a, “Heading” — or a “head WIND”?
A man in our audience-at-home reports:
“I don’t get some of your stories more than I don’t get other ones.”
Oh! okay sir — try it like this:
Put a name on it– then –“Run-with-it!”
“Ah so,” replied the man, “Ah so.”
93079-43
Sissies don’t like to be, “fucked with“! —
It reminds them of the possibility of being brave and original.
93079-44
A cure for fear is, “increased complexity.”
93079-45
The Example OF Examples:
Originality IS its own reward! —
a dull, colorless life, its cost.
93079 –46
Some of you in our viewing audience might be interested to know of this betting pool
We here in the news room have;
It concerns rumors of a new church alleged to be now forming in the city
Whose sole requirement for membership is that each follower — when & where appropriate
Publicly declare that they strictly abide by the church’s supreme tenet — to wit: that
“I don’t join NUTHIN’!”
Our wagering is around this question: Will such a new religion be an abysmal flop?–
Or a stunning success?
93079-47
A cure for fear is, “increased originality.”
93079-48
An Example of A “Neural Ultimate”:
A man who doesn’t care — doesn’t care whether you do either.
93079-49
Note: Ideas of supreme interest require no placing of emphasis.
93079-50
A bit of A Reporter’s Interprofessional Insight:
The mere existence of man can ofttimes save an otherwise-“uneventful” — news day.
93079-51
The original can seem simplistic, or it can seem complex,
But one thing’s for sure — it always seems original.
A “REAL” man don’t FOOL with punctuation!
93079-52
Over a late breakfast, one father told his son:
“Don’t run the risk of looking the fool by criticizing the religious —
For there remains the distinct possibility that they’re not at all serious,
And are just having sport at YOU!”
93079-53
More “Definitions”:
Stupidity: The simplistic’s “cry for help.”
Silence: Ofttimes, a thinker’s response.
…And a viewer asks:
“In a strict, more complex context — would you please define the word, ‘ofttimes’?”
Gladly– Ofttimes: Never.
93079-54
And by request this evening, we present some entries from the:
“Official Comic Book Definitive Index Guide”:
Superman: The mind.
Batman: The mind in a mask.
Superwoman: The mind as a cross dresser.
The Mind: The potential, “Super Mind.”
93079-55
Sissies don’t “ask” for help — their lives are a continuing request.
93079_56
City-styled simplicity is never original — the individually-enriched version, otherwise.
93079-57
A man with sweet potatoes in his summer slacks has no need for non sequiturs.
93079-58
Great Story, Mort — a bit long I thought — but “Great” nonetheless! —
And that reminds me that a viewer recently wrote in and asked about a related matter,
And this obviously would be an opportune moment to reply thereto, don’t you think, Mort? –
Yes, I knew you’d agree:
Non sequiturs are what the ordinary hope will at least be left over after Captain-Irony,
And Princess Paradox finally depart on that “Great Eternal Honeymoon– Far, Far From Here.
93079-59
Now from our Physics Desk:
The mass of the simplistic equals the safety and bravado of the collective;
Its velocity is measured in single human life-times.
93079-60
The feeling that one should somehow, “do better” in life
Is no more than the collective’s name for the individual’s urge to, “be more original.”
93079-61
And for some,
What I’m sure may sound like, “Good news”:
The simple are always serious.
93079 – 62
That most solemn voice that prods and annoys the ordinary to, “do-better” in their lives,
Is but a ventriloquist’s version of a complex man’s joyful lust to,
“Be more original” in his.
93079 63
What IS too short to “short change” more than the brevity of a man’s mental life expectancy?
93079-64
With the routine, originality counts for little–with thinkers, nothing counts MORE.
93079-65
One man mused:
“There’s nothing wrong with humans that being a little more human wouldn’t fix.”