Summary = TBD
Condensed News Items = See Below
News Item Gallery = jcap 93063 -1132
Transcript = None
Key Words =
The News
93063- 1
‘Query: Why associate with your peers if they’re as dumb as you are?
Query: Why succumb to the pressure to associate?
Query: Why HAVE peers!?
Query Query: Who taught men to ask so many questions?!
If you’re city-sane there is a certain one-eyed monster always lurking just beyond
your local horizon.
93063-2
The worst thing — I’m sorry, I mean,
One of the great things about criticizing is that once you start — there’s no-o-o stopping.
93063-3
One man refused to be accused of, “arrested development,”
saying that no one YET had taken HIM into custody.
93063-4
Re The Matter Of “Life,” (Intellectually & Otherwise):
Life says: “Feed the children first.”
Life says: “Feed the children their parents.”
93063-5
At any given time,
No matter where collective intelligence stands,
An individual thinker knows more.
93063- 6
In The City, Here’s How Some Things Still Are:
Everybody wants to be “shipped home” when they die —
Except no one knows where home is — and no one wants to die!
93063- 7
Now on to our Definitions Desk:
Despair: Neurons’ anticipation of tomorrow’s hormonal loss — or perhaps,
the other way about.
** “Who knows, sweet Guinevere, what does it matter!? —
Just so long as despondency is within our grasp.” **
But enough of that — let’s move on to some news from the world of Theology:
One chap in a nearby city offers this pondering:
“Would man be religious if he knew no more — KNEW no more — of suffering than
Do his fellow beasts who can only do so silently!?”
And now for some sports scores (if you’re still local and still live around here):
The Scores: They’re still ahead! — As always!
93063-8
Those who feel special ARE special! (but, not in any way very special).
“Okay, sir, as your prize: Would you prefer to be rich, wise, or beautiful?”
“It’s a trick question, right!?”
“Sir, they ALL are — they all are.”
93063-9
Note, On the Construction Of The Human Edifice:
Words: The shingles of civilization;
Words: Its termites, as well..
93063-10
Latest Report from This Spring’s, “Intellectual Roundup”:
Every time this one wrangler would pull out ahead — off on his own –
And look back over his shoulder–
A herd was always behind him;
He finally realized it was his own sweet ass he was draggin’ along.
93063-11
Those emotions unique to man must be given priority —
…least wise, amongst ordinary folks.
93063-12
Ahhh — to prove the collective wrong;
Ahhh — what a challenge.
93063-13
Outside of routine genealogy, real thinkers have their own particular line of ancestry.
930 63 14
The Proverb Prophet proclaimed:
“A man with two watches never knows the correct time!”
And a fellow stood in the back of the audience and proclaimed back:
“Neither does a man with one, or a hundred and nineteen.”
And the Prophet fled in faux disgrace.
93063-15
Man invented the Social Sciences to try and make himself look better
In light of how he turned out looking in the cold light of the Physical Sciences.
…(Why the former are called the “Soft” ones, and the latter, the “Hard.”)
93063-16
Attention:
Life’ll be especially good to you if you’ll be especially good to it.
…(Life told me quite privately that it’ll be especially good to me if I’d tell you that lie.)
93063-17
One satisfying aspect of the human existence,
When seen without intermediary aides,
Is that: There is no, “passing grade” in life.
93063 18
In one city the leading several Schools of Philosophy were, by name, the:
Why Should We Be Happy When We’re Just Going To Die school, and the:
Why Should We Be Happy When We KNOW We’re Going To Die faction, and then the:
Why Did They LET US KNOW We’re Going To Die, bunch.
“Jeeves, you can turn off the engine now, I believe I’ll just expire here in the back seat.”
93063-19
Sensations and information don’t play favorites — only a man’s mind.
93063 20
The critics-of-man,
The critics-of-man
Oh where shall we stand?
We critics of man.
* The line forms over here, bub! *
93063-21
A one-eyed monster could prove a man’s best friend — IF he had at least
three feeding stations at which to entertain & distract the beast.
93063 -22
The first “real thinker’s” first comment after he was first thrown out of Eden:
“Hey! — whose hand is that any way, up my intellectual knickers!?”
Notice: The Intergalactic Puppeteers Society will meet as usual on Tuesday.
93063-23
One man began calling his brain Spot, so as to encourage his dog to
“do better”…or was it the other way around?
93063 -24
Sexual Etiquette Update:
A real gentleman always stands when complementary hormones enter the room.
93063-25
The ordinary operations of the brain atop the ole spinal cord
Have little to do with what we call actually “thinking” around these here parts —
Oh!, it has SOMETHING to do with it — but not much.
Another Public Service Announcement brought to you courtesy of the,
Plain As Hell Foundation & Trust.
93063-26
The Use and Logic of Remembering Certain Things:
Remember: A man in debt — is “alive”;
Remember: A man WAY IN over his head is “civilized.”
93063 – 27
A man taken away from his own natural beliefs
Is like separated Siamese twins that have been joined back together
At the area where lightning first wants to strike the goo.
It is man longing to leave himself as he is now;
It is man forever yearning to no longer BE himself as “Now” always dictates.
93063-28
Legend has it that the philosophy of one herd was:
“Either eat the grass, or be et BY the grass.”
93063-29
History:
When a thinker first goes to the city,
And someone initially tells him what they know,
He first realizes they don’t know anything over there.
93063-30
The dumb like to talk about dumb things.
…(Need I make some dumb epilogical comment regarding man’s –
Routine mental constructs and civil institutions!?)
93063-31
As he lay dying, this one man asked if they would but play one more time,
His “Favorite song” …and then sat up and wondered if he was actually dying or
about to keep on living that same old song & life?
93063-32
It will always be late — REAL late, before a thinker despairs and submits.
93063-33
And now this late-breaking Description brought to you by our crack Investigative News Team:
Ordinary “Intellectuals” are those who will, “Take the money and run,” long before they have any money, or can run.
Thus, is City Civilization well founded on dependable, mental bedrock.
93063-34
The tourist brochure exclaimed:
“Why WAIT until your hormones are OLD to travel?!”
Those who “listen intently” to their bodies — sure have a lot to listen to.
One man turned to his bud and said:
“Rover – I’m a’telling you now – I’m either a’changing that station once & for all – OR
I’m a’throwing away the damn radio!”
93063-35
Ordinary people don’t want to be told, “how things are”! —
That’s one of the ways they stay ordinary, thank you.
93063 36
One man,
Playing both the parts of Professor Perkins, and Doctor Singletary,
Engaged himself in the following conversation:
“I say Perkins, are the dumb harder to insult, or does it just seem that way?”
“Why do you ask? Singletary, old man?”
93063-37
Insider’s Dogmatic Tip:
A man who has a hero hasn’t got a chance.
Bow wow.
93063-38
Some brain knots issued the following press release:
“The news don’t mean shit to Kimberly & Clark! —
And the Southeast Passage is of no interest to Lewis & Clark! —
What you people on downstream from us can make of all this is up to you.”
93063-39
A real thinker is secretly, and silently his own hero.
93063 -40
Only the dumb take the news seriously! — And why should they not!? –
After all — it is about them.
93063 -41
An Expert: Who the cows look to.
93063-42
The crude are like, bodies with brains,
And the civilized like, brains with bodies,
And independent thinkers, like travelers
With shopping bags in both hands,
Passing through the bus stations of life, pretending to have a “matched set of luggage.”
“Turn the window fan on low, Estelle, I brought my OWN strain of malaria along WITH me.”
93063-43
Man’s Collective Intelligence: An infinite “stalling tactic.”
93063-44
The rescue note in the bottle said, and pleaded:
“Help! — I’m being held captive by someone inside a human get-up!
Hurry! — it could be a disguise!”
93063-45
The king of one world,
Had secretly tattooed on his upper neural thigh,
Hidden deep within the historical, comfy folds of his civilized royal robe,
This personal, “Use it when you can” slogan:
“Count me in when it’s time to sin.”
* Part-time morality is smart-time morality. *
93063.-46
A real intellectual is always surrounded by dunderheads;
…(See! — I do know what you like.)
93063-47
A serious, reflective, city man who’ll, “Tell you the truth as he knows it,”
Has thirty-eight shells in one pocket, and forty-five slugs in the other,
And suicide on his mind—Your suicide!
93063-48
Everyone enjoys advice except a man actually trying to think.
93063 49
Note Regarding Intellectual Culinary Etiquette:
One diner announced: “I shall slop no hogs before their time!”
And his talking pocket watch promptly reminded him that he WAS the slop,
and that he BE de hogs.
93063-50
Now this from our Weather Desk:
Only the dumb talk about death –Death, death, death, death, death!
Only the stupid discuss bungles — Bungle, bungle, bungle, bungle, bungle!
Only the dumb mention the stupid, and only the stupid, the dumb —
Got’cha, got’cha, got’cha!
The Dewy Arbitron Institute reminds you that:
“If the news makes sense to you — YOU’RE crazy!”
93063-51
As his mind wised up just a bit,
One man reflected unto himself the following:
“Which is the bigger pisser of a job? —
Being a critic of man — OR,
Being upset BY his critics!?”
93063-52
From a certain civilized view:
Hormones are like the packing material our neurons are shipped to us in.
93063-53
And now this interesting feature from our, “Dig It” desk:
A thinker’s only pleasure doesn’t come from only one area.
$3063-54
Remember now, boys and girls —
The only reliable benefit of being grown and older is that you can say to those who’re younger: “Remember now, boys and girls….”
93063-55
Only those of SUB “tar-baby-intelligence” STRUGGLE WITH tar babies.
….(Same, of course, with thinkers, and ordinary thought.)
93063-56
Location Definition:
Where Everything Overlaps and Runs Together: Where you’ll find a thinker.
93063 -57
Tip For Twentieth Century Existence:
A man still running on hormones
By now may be too far-gone.
All the people in this one locale, arose as one and said:
“That’s sure what we need, all right! — a ‘tip’ — a tip on how to friggin’ live!”
— Well, Hey, folks! — get touchy, why don’t cha!
93063-58
The civilized are all being dragged along behind their tongue.
93063-59
One court courtier so counseled his son:
Don’t be clever in the presence of the king,
Not if you cherish your ding-a-ling-a-ling.
(Local reality would also appreciate it if you would remember and adopt this
in regard to your relationship with it,
…it says you can skip the rhyme and rhythm part of it
if you’ll just “use it.”)
93063-60
More of “How Things Might Could Be (Maybe)”:
Those who know-a-lot — might, talk a lot —
they also might shut UP a lot as well.
93063-61
Noted Eve to Adam:
“Once you have named the animals, you have labeled our emotions.”
93063-62
One aspect of “being civilized” is to forget, at least partially,
That the primary purpose of life is in being alive.
93063-63
All talk is artificial — insofar as people are also.
93063 64
Instead of a microscope, a telescope, or other lab equipment, a thinker has his mind.
93063-65
Some, Show Business News:
Man IS the “closing act.”
93063-66
A real thinker’s world is one of non, mutual-exclusivity –
Which, perhaps, makes it the most exclusive one of all.