Summary = TBD
Condensed News Items = See Below
News Item Gallery = jcap 93058 -1127
Transcript = None
Key Words =
Individually, the purpose of life is to live —
Collectively, it is to appear as pursuing larger goals.
The belief that some city-available ideas are more important than others
Is the assumption that vitamin E is preferable to A, or C.
From an alleyway, life,”Psted” at passing man:
“Pst! Wanna buy some flea repellant?”
And man replied: “I don’t have fleas!”
And life said: “Want some?!”
One man told his son:
“That continual, rhythmic pounding you hear is either the
Footsteps of progress, forever marching onward,
Or else you’re developing migraines.”
Here’s an interesting item from the latest issue of the,
“New England Journal of Mortuary Arts & Sciences”:
If you let the last generation catch up with you — you’re a DEAD MAN!.
They wanna come around and examine your house.
Fact: A real thinker is never home.
(Well….he never SEEMS to be, at least)
And now to our Definitions Desk once more:
Morality: A subject introduced by civilization to afford men the opportunity
to tell other people how they should be conducting their private lives
without either getting their face slapped, or being laughed out of town.
“Say, lad — where’d you get that rich sense of humor?”
“From my dad. “
“And where’d he get his?”
“From his dad.”
“And where’d his dad get his?”
“From life itself, you snot brain.”
“Har har, boy! That’s a good ‘un. ‘Snot brain!’ Har, har!”
Partisan-thinking is an ill-directed attempt at an “intellectual, conservation-of-energy.”
A History — A “Chronology”, if you will — “I told you my name’s not Will!” —
For some years one man looked at life —
Then for some more years he looked at himself —
Then for some later years he looked at other people,
And then in some even later years, looked back at life and said:
“Well — get to the point!”
And now a Traveler’s Tip:
When you “Know the point” — you take it with you …wherever you go.
“Yes indeed.”, said local reality as it showed some visiting humans about,
“Life itself has many supporters around here —
And now that you’re born — you’re one of them.”
The standard treatment for civilized ills is along the lines of
Using embroidery to cover sores,
Which were originally placed over some decorative patches
That were first put there to mask some cuts
That were originally on top of a colorful hemstitch,
Etc., and so-forth, and so-on, and cha-cha-cha, and like that-all.
The humor of a thinker is not exactly the same as that of ordinary people.
Another “fine item” from our fine department of:
“The Obvious Made Understatedly Ridiculous’ …Not To MENTION Even MORE Obvious Than Before.”
And now over to our Metaphysical & Plumbing Desk for this news item in dialogue form:
“How do you know you’re getting old?”
“You get serious.”
“Well, how do you know you’re getting TOO old?”
“You get TOO serious.”
And a query for all of you advanced thinkers, and trombonists with tight spit valves:
Just what IS, “too serious”? —
Is it possible to even BE serious with OUT being, “too serious”?
….I’ve just been handed this late-breaking wind — I mean, story:
The simple seems serious…while the complex appears beyond the reach of most.
One man stood and said: “Life has no effect on me! —
….the jury is still out on the matter of death.”
A viewer asks:
“Well, if death is not serious,
And being alive is not serious –
Then what IS?”
And now let’s move over to our Religious Desk for some news:
The crude continue to laugh at crudeness;
The crude want you to laugh at it also;
If you don’t — the crude are prepared to kill-you.
(For those of you expecting something different,
You may substitute other words here for, “the crude”, and for, “laugh at.”)
Only the simple, (and the unacceptably deranged),
Believe that life cares, in particular, what THEY think and do.
When it comes to man — life plays a “numbers game.”
Sheep and cows make good friends — not GREAT! But “good.”
And now this definitive item from our Gourmet Department:
Memories: Comfort-food for the infantile.
“Just think,” thought one man,
“How much time a real thinker saves in not trying to find the
‘Separate causes’ for everything that happens.”
Only two types of people will consistently attempt the impossible —
— The insane, and independent thinkers.
…(and, “No, you cannot ask me “What the difference is”!)
The simple always know what time it is —
It’s either: too early — or, too late.
An assistant to local conditions told men: “Take a number and stand in line.
And men replied: “But we ARE a line.”
And the toady said: “Now! — that’s better!” —
And as he walked away,
Some of the men sighed,
Some stuck out their tongues,
A few just shrugged,
But — but, by Geehosafat! They all stayed IN line!
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Corollary After The Just Read Fact:
A real thinker may be in line — but he don’t, (by god) have a fucking number.
(Yeah — I knew you’d all like that one too.)
One man’s theory, (allegorical, he says, and otherwise) is that:
“Neurons drink, and hormones have the hang-overs.”
I guess we might all should hope he doesn’t carry this line of thinking
Any further into the over-all subject of civilization in general, eh what?
Men like to believe in the mysterious since they can’t bear the obvious.
Local conditions told a bunch of guys:
“Hey! — if life had a’wanted you to ‘KNOW something’ — it’da TOLD you!”
Children and grown-up children believe and enjoy myths.
Myths: Stand-ins for the future.
The subject on the-agenda for tonight’s Subject Desk is, (as always) “Thinking & Plagiarism.”
Life doesn’t care if you’re a plagiarist — it doesn’t even know what the word means;
Others don’t care if you’re a plagiarist since they are too;
Only you — only you can care.
Reflected one man:
“If the serious don’t know anything,
And those on a mission are always lost,
Then what do I have to actually fear in the city!?”
Moral: While civilization may step-on-your-dick, it won’t give you the clap.
One man mused: “Ahhh — civilization is my friend.
And near-by, civilization co-equally mused: “Ahhh — how dumb can humans be?”
With a slap to his own face, one man said, in exasperation:
“Damn! — I keep forgetting that they’re not serious!”
To allow your thinking to be little more than a support for partisan purposes
Is to be normal, ordinary, sane, rational, and simplistic.
And now on to some sports scores. — (some other “sports scores”).
“Intellectual, conservation-of-energy” is no job for amateurs.
Once he’d begun to understand what less partisan thinking was all about,
One man said to that part of himself that had been passing itself off as his mind:
“I’m sending you back home to mama.”
In this one place,
On the several annual holidays they had,
During which time the men would get rowdy and pretend that they were
“Glad to be there and to be alive.”
Ofttimes local conditions itself would have a few of the drinks it was serving,
And begin to go around slapping the more cheerful of the celebrants on the back and shouting
“Drink my liquor and LIE to me!”
The more complex you are, the harder it is to only minimally think —
— Most people enjoy the, “simple life.”
And an entry from our little, “Private Book Of Private Etiquette”:
When a thinker must converse with a civilian he should always let the civilian
have the last word — always.
The life of the criminal and the life of the insane differ in that
While they’re both driven by boredom, the criminal is not as crazy as the insane.
And now for some farm prices — some other “farm prices.”
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Lots of silly children go on to become serious adults.
And now our, Joke for The Day: The word, “lots.”
A Short Menu Of Definitions:
History: Week-old news.
News: Day-old garbage.
Non-Edible Thinking: Tomorrow’s feast ..always, tomorrow’s.
And from a viewer, this letter came in to the Sports Desk:
“It seems that my hormones and neurons can fall in love with
Two different people at the same time;
Is this unusual? —
Should I do anything about it?
At street, city-level
The simple are always too simple,
And the pseudo complex always too pseudo-ly complex,
So where does that leave the few not claiming direct mental descendancy from
Adam-&-Romulus, or Remus-&-Eve!?
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Alpha: You can “intellectually, dance-with-yourself” — if no one is watching.
Beta: No one is watching.
As regards the omniscient, eternal struggle between the forces of
Light-&-progress, and of darkness-&-regression,
At street-level — civilization is the ultimate “good guy.”
If you were born — you were born wearing somebody else’s clothes —
But is that any excuse for a thinker to further take up the habit of carrying a hat!?
Definition Fashion Follow-Up–
Sanity: Limitations on thought.
A simple man,
Is a happy man,
If he stays
In a simple land.
Upon hearing this little verse,
One man turned quickly to all his kin and said:
“Dorkus — Bye! — I’m outta here!”
D.T.- (“Definition Time” ….actually: D.T.A. — “Definition Time Again” :
An Independent Thinker: A “Schemer” without a scheme.
One man would drop trash in his floor just so he could come along later and say:
“Okay — who dropped this crap on the floor?”
This man has five billion twin brothers and sisters — (Give or take seventeen people or so).
Non-partisan thought makes EVERYBODY look like a fool.
Life only grows in areas of complexity — where there is variety —
And in the mind of man it finds its greatest opportunity.
To “think for yourself,”
You must be able to eat bullets ….and not complain.
A viewer asks:
“Exactly what does the term, ‘think for yourself’ actually represent?”
And sir, or madam, I must respond truthfully and tell you — Nothing! —
The term by its very nature is meaningless & an impossibility.
To “think for yourself”
You must be able to eat bullets ….and not complain …. or, ask about it.