Summary = TBD
Condensed News Items =See Below
News Item Gallery = jcap 93017 -1086
Transcript = None
Key Words =
The News
93017-1
Only crazy people — people who don’t know what to think next — will admit it.
…(Talk about your CRAZY!)
93017- 2
The fact that collective intelligence IS always correct and functional
Is the only reason it is possible FOR an individual to ever realize its inchoateness.
93017– 3
Never attribute more than two distinct characteristics to anything — your mind won’t like it if you do.
93017- 4
Men who don’t want to have to try and actually think-for-themselves can always find a friend — if not, anxious leader.
“Say — where have all you cows been? — do you know how long I’ve been waiting here?”
93017- 5
Men have good reason to dislike machines,
Since most of them will spill stuff on you if they have the chance.
93017– 6
Whenever they die, most famous people quit being quite so famous!
93017-7
The price of stability is slow movement;
the collective’s intelligence is stable, and so is each man’s therein.
93011- 8
In his attempt to encourage himself in more rigorously, objective intellectual pursuits, one man began to read only the dictionary — and that, only after he’d removed all of the adjectives and adverbs.
Who but — (god bless ’em, one and all) – humans CARE if
Two plus two equals four. . . . . and maybe, six?!
Then again: not caring is what keeps dumb animals – (god bless ‘em, up, and down)– dumb..
93017- 9
Just to stay on its good side and keep it amused,
One man continued to pretend that he wanted to look up life’s skirt.
93017-10
The size of a man’s ears determines how much he can hear–no, wait —
The extent of a man’s education determines how much he can hear–no-o-o….hold it. The scope of a man’s experiences will determine how much he can hear — hey! —
NOTHING determines how much a man can hear and understand.
— nothing other than his being alive.
93017-11
The notice of criticism is the acceptance of criticism.
* Ideas not held overnight are not subject to dispute. *
No matter what time it is intellectually, a real thinker is not there; beyond all concepts of early, or late, or timely, resides real thought.
93017 -12
The dense who like to attend lectures tend to agreeingly nod their heads a lot.
(So do cows in a field.)
A man in the back of the room,
Reacting as quickly as was possible for him,
Whispered to his mind and its cranium container:
“If you make even the slightest move in response to what was just read, when I get you home, I’ll give you the silly-slapping of your life!”
93017-13
Civilized people can convey no information that is not self-serving, in that their unwitting allegiance always lies with ideas that support the standard form of being civilized.
Civilized: A generic, off-the-rack, one-size-fits-all, intellectual garment Life throws around everyone’s hormones.
930 17 -14
Imitation: The highest form of bovian originality.
93017-15
One man’s secret, Saturday motto:
“They can sure as hell kill me and mail my parts out to various other cities, but I’ll be damned if I’ll let ’em make me any dumber than I am already.”
Seven-day shelf-life, fact:
Any would-be individual thinker who accepts ANY idea from the storehouse of collective wisdom and intelligence HAS let ’em, “do it to him.”
93017 – 16
Remember: “Almost” only counts in horseshoes,
religion,
certainty,
and all other strictly human activities.
93017-17
One child’s game:
“Hey! – let’s all hide our ‘little-dirty-secrets’! —
Hey! – let’s all hide ourselves!” —
Then when all the rest of him would hear this — they’d just laugh-h-h, and laugh-h-h, and laugh!
93017-18
It is extremely difficult to be collectively-sane with OUT becoming serious; and even more so to stay that way and ever become intelligent.
* If men were not upset at clouds and rain they might look directly AT the sun. *
,„(can’t have that!)
93017 – 19
Fact: Dumb animals make the best friends.
Improved Fact: Make that: Pliable animals make the best friends.
A Thus Fact: Thus are most men either their own best friend, or they’re not.
93017 -20
The Life of The Independent Thinker: Life gives him a coloring book,
And he turns it into a jigsaw puzzle.
93011 -21
The orchestra leader announced the title of the next song:
“Everybody Wants to Be Important Except Those Who Want to Be Pushed Around,”
and then said to the crowd around the band stand:
“Which makes it all come out even, and gives EVERY body SOME body to dance with.”
93017-22
Nostalgia’s not much without somebody to think about it.
93017-23
From a more complex view,
It is in fact the less sensitive who act the most.
93017-24
Cows are sensitive–men merely near-sighted and given to crying jags.
Collective intelligence impresses on each man’s mind the belief that if
he does not feel sympathy for the fact that we’re all short, fat, ugly and gonna die, that he may end up as a super hideous corpse with not a mourner in sight.
You can count on this: Civilization will LOOK AFTER itself,
whether you can afford a good funeral or not.
93017-25
One man had a tank that would rumble through his back yard — no, I’m sorry, it was his head.
93017 -26
If rats could fly,
They’d then complain that corn wasn’t air borne.
A man wanting to understand the point-blank, “pointedness-of-operations of the human mind” could learn a lot from rodents, seed-crops, and aerial acrobatics.
93017- 27
If you want to try for a fresh look at how life operates through man
You could take areas that seem least pertinent and reliable —
Such as advertising and economic forecasting —
And consider how they are in fact, most exemplary of civilized, human existence.
Only the dense worry over where and when the period will come in a sentence
when they have yet to learn how to put a coherent one together in the first place.
The slow-of-wit need no intellectual protection — which is why they are so vehement in their attempts to put up some.
* “Okay, all you hombres! – I’m gonna shoot every damn, dumb-ass in this place!” “But Wild Bill, you can’t DO that!”
“Oh YEAH?! — and why not?”
“Because ‘all-of-us’ makes UP the place.” *
93017-28
Cheap men are happy men.
Expensive men would like a new definition of, “happy.”
93017 -29
The mind of the herd runs to scavenging.
93017
Only the dead can imagine a life free of pain,
And only the individually alive, one without intellectual rashes and fever blisters.
Once the train has obviously and undeniably gone from the station, many of the men left standing on the platform will say to one another; “Well — what choice did we have?!”
That questions normally come at the end of human episodes should suggest something.
93017-31
Those who rhapsodize about “personal relationships,” well deserve them.
Poet: A man with a bent dick and only a pencil with which to try and straighten it out .
93017 32
“A Brief History of Man, (Again)”:
First, men made up words;
Then almost immediately, made up definitions to go with them,
And then right after that, began to dispute the correctness of the definitions.
The history of man will never stop, not when we’ve got this kind of slop.
Tramp, tramp, tramp.)
93017-33
Any reasonably intelligent cow
can readily point out how
any new kind of hay thrown before it
is obviously dangerous and unfit to eat.
93017 -34
Cattle,
And civilized men
Can only eat foods that have an even number of letters in their name.
The key to all physical and mental health is “balance” —
One, two; up, down, yes, no,
heave, ho — (and like that).
93017 35
The way to keep any machinery from hurting you, disappointing you, or making you mad is quite simple— You must just WATCH IT at all times.
“Wow, Clarence! — I sure hope he ain’t includin’ the mind in that.”
93017-36
From many an operational view, religion turns out to be the attempt at
“Limbic eroticism” with the attempt to remove the “erot.”
93017-37
An ordinary man can no more think-for-himself disencumbered of collective intelligence than a fish can be free from the water.
* A real thinker is NO body’s fool! Well… maybe just one body.’s.) *
93017-38
An item of unrecorded, collective psychology:
If you can make somebody feel bad enough — they’ll become your friend.
Cows not content with their bovine condition have gotta stick together. A man not satisfied with being cattle has gotta get outta here.
93017-39
A guileless thinker might be nice simply because that’s what a point-blank-wall dictates.
93017 -40
Every night as he would lie down to go to sleep, one man would say to his mind: “Go get ’em, Tiger!”
93017-41
Those with collective-based morals,
Given the suitable circumstances — will kill you.
A fact that needs be compared to seem valid, is a Styrofoam fact.
93017 -42
Having a small mind does NOT relieve one of the responsibility of going ahead and having small thoughts.
Life loves a cheerful chicken with a fist around its throat.
93017 -43
Life told one man that he could do anything he wanted to, intellectually —
— No, it didn’t — and that’s exactly why it is possible for a few.
* A real artist is one who can burn all his paintings, and sell photographs of the bonfire. *
When collective minds don’t know where to go next, they’ll suspend operations temporarily. Under similar conditions, an independent thinker will go on,
just as though everything was all right and normal. . . . . which it is! -whenever HE makes
such an effort.
93017 -44
Fact: Everyone alive is apparently “under-appreciated.” Fact: Hey! — you ain’t seen NOTHING yet!
93017 -45
Since there’s only one thing that distinguishes man from other animals he must believe there are many.
93017 -46
Only those not severely falling can catch themselves.
“Hey!” said a man, looking at his hands and his own self, “Why the hell would I ever wanna snatch and save this thing?!”
At one time,
After such pithy insights as this was made by a man,
Life would speak to him and say: “Well done!” (or something of a similar nature), but it had to stop once it realized that men had no idea who was talking to them, and were beginning to invent the damndest stories to try and explain it.
93017 47
A man with an adjective in his name has already “said it all.”
93017-48
To try and simplify matters,
(Which is always in order — unless you’re part of the collective ordinary) this one club of independent thinkers decided that,
As a matter of policy,
They would not accept or believe ANY thing that anybody told them — including themselves.
..(The advanced, “secret organization” within the club took it a bit further, and amongst themselves decided not to honor this policy,
or to even act as though they’d ever heard of it.)
Self-proclaimed “rebels” also make admissions they wouldn’t care for — IF they ever became aware of it.
93017-49
Whenever this one man would have a meaningful thought, he’d tell his mind: “Make a note of that.”
And after some many years of this
he had collected enough material to start his own cemetery.
93017-50
One tribe believes that if you let anyone see your soul that it’ll make all the photographs of you fade.
93017-51
No cow is worth a real thinker’s ire.
93017 -52
Circumcision: What doctors do to one end, that collective-intelligence does to the other.
Examining the customer’s head closely, the barber asked: “Want me to take some off the sides?”
And the man in the chair replied:
“Oh no! — I have none to spare up there as it is.”
93017-53
Cows do not need any additional nitrate in their brains.
93017-54
One news service would periodically slip in a nonsensical item just to see how readers would react.
This is not one of them.
93017 -55
Civilization is assisted by men believing it is more complicated than it is.
93017-56
In this universe,
If life didn’t have two hands,
And men didn’t have two brains,
The magic tricks wouldn’t be NEARLY as interesting.
93017–57
Only one person is smarter than an independent thinker — and that’s himself — tomorrow!
93017-58
Amongst all sounds, the human voice is curious, — and never more so than when it talks.
93017 59
Fast-breaking’ up-date:
“There’s only one person smarter than an independent-thinker – and that’s himself –tomorrow.” Corollary: A real thinker has no future.
93017-60
The distance observers note between planets generally equals the time lapse that has occurred between their last two original thoughts.
93017-61
Man is an animal with a tree in it.
93011-62
Man can find symbolic lessons in nature,
And man can find them in architecture;
How thoroughly wondrous is the latter possibility.
93017 -63
A man who thinks he can only be taught by his local conditions — can’t be taught much.
93017-64
Anyone who’ s planning to eventually die doesn’t owe any body anything.
93017-65
Yes, it does always feel good to have a friend rub you in the right place.
93017 -66
The collective don’t get out much.
93017-67
Not only is a real thinker quite prepared to paint-himself-into-a-corner, but will in fact — bring along his own corner.
93017-68
A real person never grows up — a real person can’t.
93017-69
The collective don’t get it.