Ahhhhh – but it’s slick and trickier than a Bolivian trying to see the sea, but if you stay aware of what is going on in your head and not, “what you are thinking”, but, “what is going on in there” – and you take advantage of a special capacity for honesty that is unique to those wired to awaken, you can stop pretending and being dis-genuine.
If you want to, it is easy to see, and then acknowledge that you mostly don’t know what you’re talking OR thinking about. Try it – take a quick glance and admit it: you don’t know shit. You and everyone else just pretend that you do. There is nothing wrong in this, for without it, life as we know it would collapse, (and man’s second reality, disappear altogether).
You can never wake up, see the light and be free if you cannot be honest. There is but one form of “honesty”. The admission that beyond knowing that those are your fingers on your hands,
that you feel sad, that 4th Street is two blocks east, that beyond knowing such as that, you do not really know anything – and neither does anyone else, including experts in their respective fields, (which is why men made up the notion of, “experts,” and “fields”).
But your only solvable problem is your lying and not the harmless variety of others. Stop coasting along, with the listening part of your mind’s passive acceptance, of whatever its talking part may say. Your mind is full of patent nonsense, but nonsense that ordinary people pretend to take seriously – they are supposed to.
If somewhere along the way you were exposed to the idea that men live in a mental dream world, and it passionately struck you as valid, and explanatory, then your problem now of, “wanting to wake up from the dream,” is one of being pretty well disgusted with living a mental life that is not genuine to you. The thoughts in your head that you are supposed to accept as being, “you” are simply not a faithful reflection OF the real you….whatever that might be…which no one knows…so, don’t climb out of one septic tank only to jump right back into another one by believing otherwise.
J.