Everyone who says that they are struggling to; “Awaken from sleep,” or, “achieve Enlightenment from ignorance,” or,” be Liberated from captivity,” believe they know what they are talking about. But all they “know” is about the words they are employing, to talk about a situation that is unknown to them.
Every person wired up to someday become attached to the ideas certainly FEELS that something is not right with them. It is clearly not back problems, to be treated by surgery, nor are they crazy, to be nursed by psychiatry or psycho-pharmaceuticals. They each initially believe that they do have the correct identification of their “problem”, and after a bit of looking about, believe that they do find a teaching, or teacher who can furnish the curative treatments.
First things, (if not first), then at least, eventually, (and in this instance you should be honestly asking yourself): “What IS the ‘problem’? I know that I confidently say that I, ‘Want to wake up,’ that I am sick of, ‘being asleep,’ but what do those two terms actually mean to me?” Forget whatever I have read or heard about them – what do I personally understand them to mean?”
The truth is you don’t know. Don’t feel embarrassed – no one does, and for you to finally realize it is a cause for rejoicing, not embarrassment. Shame would be in never recognizing this.
The most obvious follow up comment to the above would be to note that no problem can ever be solved until the problem itself is correctly understood. In the sport-of-the-few the game is much richer than that; for just realizing clearly that you do not understand at all what the problem is, IS your cure.
J.